Anne edges james to share about being a cuckold to her.
Honestly, it was natural for me to become a cuckold, not so much because of previous relative experiences of “three” or the difference of size and color (though definitely strong reasons for having to), but more importantly that from the very beginning of our relationship Anne’s sexual pleasure has always been more important than mine. Keep in mind that I enjoy sexual pleasure as much as anyone. Mine happens to be centered to Anne’s, especially and not surprisingly now when I know she is with someone giving her sexual pleasure better than I can and not hesitant to let me know this. The tease and conflict of emotions (envy, humiliation and anxiety among others) that it creates for me only intensifies my arousal. Selfish as it may seem for my own enjoyment, being her cuckold is more about her being fully satisfied, happy and in command of her sexual pleasure.
penis versus Cock
Size does matter. When my penis is flaccid, in addition to smaller testicles, it measures at best just over 3” long and 3 1⁄2” around, all easily fitting into my penis block. Some cuckolds deservedly can claim less in comparison, but for a person who is nearly 6’-4” tall it is diminutive and unexpected. When I do get a full erection, you might say I am a ‘grower’ with better than 6” in length but at best only 5” around. Long and thin. Being the first lover Anne really enjoyed discovering sexual pleasure with, my penis was satisfactory for her enjoyment over the years, and also for other women in the swing lifestyle. However, through the swing lifestyle, once the “curtain was pulled back”, Anne discovered the intensity and longevity of greater sexual pleasure from more endowed men, especially black men. It was exciting for me to share with her in the revelation but also obvious that she deserved much better than what I could offer. I can’t possibly begin to excite and fully satisfy her with the cock that she needs, very thick and long, and black. I have seen and heard what a difference it makes.
Acceptance and Trust
Cuckolded by Anne, I accept the sexual dynamics of our cuckold relationship, physical and emotional. My sexual pleasure does not include intercourse and I have to confront possible emotions of jealousy raised by her relationship with another man and trepidation of what their relationship will continue to be in the future. It is sexual desire with emotional uncertainty, and it would be understandable to be hesitant to have a cuckold marriage or relationship. But I embrace it all. The titillation of her being pleasured by her endowed black lover, along with unsettled emotions to increase my arousal…I can’t have one without the other. When I am faced with difficult emotions, I pause and look to the strength of our relationship coming from our trust in each other, communicating openly about our respective needs and pleasures, and not being afraid to challenge the passionate bond of our love that has never been anything less. It makes me feel confident to welcome bringing the third person in as a long term piece of us and certain that it will make that bond even stronger.
Empowerment and “Old Habits”
When we discovered the Cuckoldmarriage site it was almost a sense of liberation because here was a candid explanation and discussion speaking to our past sexual experiences. As we read more and “connected the dots”, it was an easy leap that our sexual relationship could and should be defined by Anne’s sexual empowerment (aside also the Bull/boyfriend). I am not that alpha male, while Anne, when with an alpha male type, becomes quickly aroused and has longer and very intense pleasure. This difference, we have now come to realize, is a positive to our sexual relationship and as we read more and talked about it could see with her embracing and exercising sexual empowerment she is free to choose and focus her pleasure away from me (with control and denial) and exclusively towards someone more suitable for her. Going forward, this probably has been the single most important element of adjustment in our relationship as a cuckold and hotwife. Also, as a challenge to overcome “old habits” and follow to better sex.
Because in the past Anne in essence was already cuckolding me by having sex alone with other men in the swing lifestyle, the transition to a cuckold couple has been a far easier leap for me in accepting the control of my sexual pleasure as directed by Anne (and her boyfriend). Though it was as easy for Anne to fully embrace a sole relationship of better sex with another man (which we both agree is far better than the random and sometimes superficial sex in the swing lifestyle) it has also been about Anne learning how not having intercourse with me can make for a better sexual “relationship of three”. She will tell you it has been difficult for her to have a different response when we are being intimate in bed and intercourse is not to occur. Though we have agreed that there are other pleasurable options for each of us when being intimate, it is not easy for her to refrain from defaulting to having my penis in her and enjoying a familiar pleasure, though not as good as what she receives from her boyfriend. With encouragement to fully exercise being empowered about her needs from the relationship with her boyfriend, she is now becoming more comfortable about not having intercourse with me (it has been several weeks now) while also controlling my sexual pleasure, differently, but more intensely. What used to be me inside her pussy laying motionless while she moved her hips and masturbated on my penis to a single climax followed then by a few quick strokes by me to dribble out some semen in her, is now replaced by her extended time alone in bed with her boyfriend having multiple climaxes and then afterwards at her choosing of when to take my penis block off, her quickly stroking my erect penis to a very intense ejaculation (sometimes ruined but only taking a minute or two) while also telling me how sex with her boyfriend is much better.
Anne’s empowerment has also become my chastity. Inherently my cuckold penis is inadequate for her full pleasure. Her requiring me to wear a penis block externally reinforces that intercourse is not an option, and to remind me why she has a boyfriend. The effect of wearing the block is not as much about discomfort if I become aroused but the desire for differing sensations of denial stirred in me from having to exhibit my inadequacy, especially by their choosing. It might be that I’m naked for their viewing and teasing while I have to tend to their needs, or if they want their alone time together, having to wear it publicly while away. My reactions emotionally and physically each become very different. Mixed emotions of titillation, anxiety, and humiliation are raised, but between my legs, I must accept having to display a confined and flaccid penis. Embarrassing while exhilarating. Gratefully, when Anne eventually does take it off, and with a little attention, my penis rises to a stronger erection than I normally would have.
Occasionally Anne will ask me if I no longer want to have intercourse with her. My response is not that I don’t want to but having her preventing and denying me intercourse while she deliberately and openly does with her boyfriend is more arousing and intensely emotional. Watching or listening to the alpha male is exciting. He can do things for her and with her aggressively and longer in the bedroom than I ever could. Later when my sexual release does eventually happen with her hand, along with that pleasure is a confirmation of her control and the passionate intimacy that we share as a cuckold couple.
So why would I just want to only have intercourse?