Reply To: What Is It Like To Be Cuckolded?

I well understand what the first comment above spoke about. StokieUKcpl spoke of his most inner feelings. And, I believe that he spoke for many of us who have been honest with their wife or girlfriend. And, likewise for these same guys, cuckolds like me and many more, who let their partner be honest in their relationship, he spoke for each one of us. The cuckold allows her, the most wonderful gift he can provide; that she can be honest with him, her true partner. Of course, such transparency on the part of the cuckold creates many unique and even paradoxical feelings. Cuckolds, I will venture to say, most cuckolds, feel many feelings at once (hence, the expression, Flooded with Feelings). And many who can’t understand the mind of a cuckold; those without a clue; those willing to believe that they control their wife or girlfriend when they truly do not; those who cannot face their own inadequacy; those who have no clue that their woman is very unsatisfied; they will find out really “the hard-way” what a bad marriage/relationship is about (and it does not involve an erection).
What is described by StokieUKcpl (above) is actually bravery and total devotion. He describes how he cried and kept his word to his wife; that, he was willing to have agreed to her receiving pleasure from another man. He looked at his own inadequacy for what it is and realized that he must stay devoted to his wife. For sure he loves this woman. And he wants to stay with her, for their marriage to continue on. This gentleman has described many of my own feelings. I too have agreed. I became willing for her to be with another man. Understanding the physical needs of my wife; I too, examined my own inadequacy and shortcomings. While it has produced much frustration within myself, I needed to focus on what is most important. And, my love and devotion must come first. I see how many couples appear to be faithful; but, later it becomes known that they have broken-up. Maybe 50 years ago, the husband ruled and only he cheated. But today, an equal number of women cheat, if not more (much more many will say) than men. Facing reality, I knew deep inside my unsatisfied wife would be seeking sex with another guy….sooner rather than later. After years of marriage, my wife finally spoke to me with real transparency. She wanted to be with another male, sexually. She was not climaxing with me thru intercourse. She named a few other issues (IE real staying power). But, the top issue was, just what I always knew and wanted to hide from, my lack of size (and thickness). While looking at this site before I opened a dialogue with her about whether she is satisfied or not; I read something between Luvr and a potential cuckold. The boss of this site asked the potential cuckold if his wife enjoyed his small size during intercourse. And the answer was that she had told him that his small size was fine, that size was not important to her, and, that she climaxed during intercourse. Luvr, after having had conversed with him for a few moments before asking this question, saw thru this bullshit. And in no uncertain terms, Luvr stated (or strongly suggested) that his wife was not being truthful (I do not remember the exact verbiage that Luvr used.) Hearing this was a line drawn in the sand. I realized that what Luvr stated was pure logic and was in fact, applicable to me, as well. From this, I knew that I needed to have the most honest and open talk with my wife. And I subsequently learned that she was not satisfied with our lovemaking, not on a sexual level. I so welcomed her being honest. She explained that truly she loved me from the very beginning…..from our third date. From the very first date she felt safe with me. And, she knew that she would be financially safe, together with me. She explained she saw how genuine I was. And she wanted me more and more as time went by. My wife told me that she expected the sex to get better and better. She had thought that our love during our marriage would merge with our lovemaking and she’d become satisfied. Hearing this was, in-fact, traumatic. I did feel hurt. But, I knew that I needed to correct things or that she may correct things at some future point, without even asking me. My wife is very sexual and I could feel her deep need for satisfaction. With no other logical option, I was now willing to discuss her being with someone else. I knew this would not be easy for me. I knew that my initial sexual attraction to being a cuckold husband would be met with a downside. I knew that it had to be “about her” and her pleasure. The gentleman who left the first comment spoke of jealousy and actually crying; he spoke of feeling anger and betrayal. He spoke of his 6 inch penis. I too have felt this incredible angst but my penis is only 4.5 inches (on a good day). I knew that it was key for my wife to have freedom to feel real sexual pleasure. I knew my penis was not up for this task. Facing the truth is what has allowed us to remain as husband and wife. We agreed to particular rules. A few times, they were exceeded. And then, afterwards, we talked. I try to channel the pleasure of my wife, so that I can feel her pleasure…..so that I can get pleasure from her pleasure. As well, I try to manage and be accepting of my pain….my angst.
I am willing to put aside my basic sexual feelings. These feelings involve intercourse without pleasure for her. I have entered into a most specialized and sexualized state. It has many aspects. One of the aspects involves a martini of sweetness and bitterness; it involves feeling left-out at times; it involves an intense frustration; it includes feeling envy of the truly larger cock and balls (as compared to me) of the guy she is with; it involves my extra hard erection, the kind of erection that is very rare for the last several years when it is just she and I; it includes the very awkward feeling that happens when another guy is with my wife and his sense of power clearly shows, against my surrender, in fact, each and every time that I am present, or, just meet him, I can see the joy he feels as if he is taking my wife from me, and, of course, in many ways, he truly is taking her from me, at least for a while and in some cases for a while after; but, this drink includes more, it takes me down many notches and produces a very natural feeling of humiliation, or better put (as Luvr) has explained….feeling very humbled. Perhaps one of the most intriguing aspects is my extra hard erection. With cuckold angst comes very hard erections. Maybe this is the sign of the cuckold.
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Before my wife was with another guy, after we agreed she could be; I observed her flirting at a party and at a resort. Just her flirting, created the angst and the real hard erection. Just seeing her interested in another man caused this sexual arousal. Seeing each of these guys (at different times) interested in her, was so arousing. Seeing how their eyes always came back to her cleavage, and to her legs, felt incredible. As I watched my wife and her new friend talking and drinking together, on each occasion, from almost afar, I thought each time of her new prospect, leaning to kiss my wife briefly, and then, French Kissing her, and then kissing her breasts. Later, at home with her we spoke about how I felt and more importantly how she felt. She told me that she enjoyed it but that she felt some guilt. I assured her it was okay and as she saw from my erection, it excited me. But, I also told her that jealousy was mixed in and I also felt the feeling of inadequacy. That night we had wonderful and the most loving sex. We talked about the guy that night at the party and the guy at the resort (previous occasion). Although she only flirted with each of them; we got much excitement as we spoke about both guys; before our lovemaking, during our lovemaking and after. We had done this kind of talking, mixed into our sex, after she had flirted with the first guy. And what happened on this night simply added to our excitement. The guy at the party (earlier at the party, this night) was very good looking, tall, slim, younger than both of us and confident. My wife asked me if I thought about his size. And I explained I had. I told her that already, even without either of us seeing him naked, I envisioned him as being very large. My wife told me how appreciative she was of interest in her having a full size penis. She saw this as an act of love.
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Trying to further answer the question posed, I will speak about the first time my wife had sex with another man, after we were married. When I use quotes, I will be trying to remember what was said…..needless to say….this aspect of this writing will not be 100% accurate….I will be paraphrasing, based on what I remember. I had written prior to this about our first time with another guy; but, this time I try to focus on the question posed…..and it is written from a slightly different point of view.
The first we were with another man……was so very arousing to me and filled with hurt. I felt so torn up inside. I knew it could not be reversed once it happened. Although, just before it began, before he was with us, she asked me if I wanted to call it off. Part of me wanted to. My head had become very confused. I felt as if I did not know what was the right way for this to go. I had already met him but nonetheless I felt very awkward. I think he too felt some of this awkwardness. He had stated during our first meeting (my wife, him & me) that he had never been with a couple or with “a wife”; but, that this had interested him greatly. And, he stated that he had spoken to a couple once, but, that nothing had actually happened. He lived in the town where our resort was located. He was over ten yrs younger than my wife and was in his early twenties. As he and I spoke in the awkwardness of waiting for my wife to come out of the bedroom of our hotel suite; I knew (okay I just felt this) that he wanted to feel that he was causing me to become deeply affected by what would soon happen, it seemed like he wanted to feel he was causing me anguish, that humbled feeling; he wanted to be the one taking my wife from me. And, I wondered as we gently spoke, just how I’d feel when I saw his dick and how my wife would react to a really large cock (assuming his email photo was true). Talking with him, I had half an erection. At least it felt this way. I provided him with condoms and he agreed to use a condom. A few minutes later as I viewed my beautiful wife in her dress, necklace and heels; and her new friend, as they exchanged kisses, I had a full erection. And, as the man who made the first comment (above) said, I too had tears. And, I did actually cry (I tried to do this as quietly as possible). There is nothing more confusing, than feeling more sexually aroused than ever before, while seeing my wife making-out; while also feeling jealous; left-out; envy of his good looks (later of his cock and balls); and, the beginning of humiliation/feeling humbled. They had intercourse several times that evening and into the next day (and the following night). He did not directly humble me. I had told him when we originally met, this would happen naturally….and that I did not want humiliation. He agreed.
And seeing my wife together with him, caused plenty of discrete humiliation, indeed. Seeing her intense reaction to intercourse with him, was like nothing that even nearly happened between she and I. Their kissing felt like a knife in my back. Their intimacy surprised me. I did not think that the level of closeness between them would be as intense as it was. And, this rang even truer when I realized he had not put on a condom as agreed. I did not speak up about this. I now felt compelled to removing my pants. His thrusting was well beyond what I had provided to my wife. Her vagina loved his bigness. She responded to his pounding with incredible moans. I had written about this first time prior to this. There is so much I can say about this first experience, my becoming a cuckold with my wife. But this time I am trying to focus on answering the question of; what it is like to be cuckolded. Seeing their intimacy caused concern that she’d fall in love with him (at least we lived very far from him). I have seen a while back, where Luvr has said that if this happens, it is okay and that a woman can love more than one man. Still, I have felt angst over this particular issue (and others). As my wife was locked together in intercourse with this younger guy; I thought of how they seemed like they were a couple. And, it felt for a while that they were a couple and I was the outsider. When my wife told him how great his cock felt, how it was the best she had ever been with, made me feel absolutely awful and betrayed (yes although I wanted her to have real pleasure and was wanting this to happen). Seeing this young man sucking my wife’s breasts affected me beyond belief. And throughout their lovemaking, he would come back to wanting to feel mothered by her. My wife would cuddle the back of his head, like he was her baby, and hold him close, as he sucked her breasts. As he sucked each breast, my wife moaned from this pleasure. She told him “I love how you do this to me”. I had been masturbating to no end. And each time I would have an orgasm; I would become hard again as I sat and viewed him with my wife. As I watched I would smell her panties and her bra. This helped me feel some closeness to my wife. Somehow her bra and panties helped me feel bonded to her.
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I was now discreetly humiliated (yes humbled) beyond what I ever imagined.
It was compounded when she told me that she’d like him to stay until the late morning instead of for the four hours, she and I had agreed to. And, he had agreed, when we originally met him, that it would not exceed four hours. Hearing this he told her he was fine with this. Hearing this I was very upset. I never even answered and my wife never asked me again. He was going to stay longer. The best intercourse between my wife and me would be in the sitting position while we faced on another. We would French-Kiss and I would also suck her breasts and she’d hold my head to her body during the sucking of each breast. They actually had intercourse several times (he stayed the next night too). During their intercourse my wife told him she wanted this position. And, the hurt was great, as I saw she and he, in the same bed we had slept together in, during the earlier part of our stay…..as they made love facing one another in this same way.
He looked so muscular as they were coupled together, as he held her and they rocked back and forth….each mouth locked to the other….as my wife moaned and moaned…..and as they rocked back and forth…..I realized that his large cock was completely inside my wife as far as it could go. They were truly lovers. And I was sitting and viewing while I jerked off and smelled her undies, over and over. Their intercourse while facing one another was continuing and I was hurting emotionally, and needed it to end. But it did not end. But their mouths paused the kissing and my wife put her head sideways against his chest and he held her close. Still their rocking was continuing. My wife and he became more verbal; and, she told him things like “you feel so great inside me, this is unbelievable, I could do this everyday with you, I love how your cock feels, it is giant”. And, I do remember his exact words or close to it “if I had you I would not share you with anyone”. Maybe this was meant to hurt me. Hearing this I needed to leave the room. In the living room I very quietly cried. I did not want to be heard. My erection had left. And the tears filled my face. Without consciously realizing it, I brought her bra and panties with me. I held them as I cried. I would still smell them for special comfort. And this did help me. I got up from the sofa and closed the bedroom door. I tried to look away. The bedroom door was now shut and crying was easier. I saw the condoms on the coffee table which I provided. I felt betrayed by him. He shot sperm into my wife, more than once. That was not part of the deal. I composed myself. I wanted this to be the only time my wife and I would do this. As I sat on the couch I could hear them. I felt compelled to touch my penis. It became erect. I thought of his giant and thick penis and his balls…..or I should say giant and thick cock….I felt so much envy for his equipment……I wanted a cock and pair of balls like he has…..I had a very hard erection. I re-entered the bedroom. They were still facing the other; their rocking was now more gentle, actually slower. But now he was kissing her breasts. And then he sucked, one and then the other. As he sucked my wife looked at me. She said “I’m sorry but it just feels so good”. I was standing and she looked at my full erection. She then said “I’m glad you are liking this so much”. I had her bra and panties in my hand. And I felt very embarrassed being seen by her as I held them in my hand. I again sat in the chair. My wife was making loud moans and he made noise too. They were rocking intensely, I could hear her orgasm and he continued rocking. She yelled out “Its so good, so big, so big, I love it” and she’d repeat this even louder. I watched as she climaxed. But he was not done….he’d kiss her mouth and then suck her tits. And he’d kiss her neck and began to suck it. He were building up to climax inside her vagina, again. He was kissing her and sucking…..from her mouth to her breasts to her neck. His giant cock deep inside, he said “I feel so good, I’m gonna shoot now”. As he shot his sperm inside my wife, after saying these words (or similar verbiage) he held her so tight as he rocked hard as he placed his mouth on her neck. He let out a kind of sequel, his mouth on her neck and his sperm deep inside my wife. It was as if he just made love with his wife or his girlfriend. They actually made pillow talk. I wanted her back so bad. But I was kind of afraid to ask him. Again I was very envious of his cock and balls. He had just satisfied my wife. They laid together for maybe 15 minutes. She was on top of him. He had his arm around her. Seeing this made me so jealous. When she got off him, she leaked from his fluid. My wife put her face against his soft cock. And for a while, about 2 hours, they had a nap together as she lay her face in that same place.
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So…..What is it like to be cuckolded?
I hope I have provided a good idea of what it is like.