Re: In praise of Emily

Telephone summary…

‘Hi Jezz, I am very sorry to trouble you at work…but I need to talk’
‘Alright, that’s OK James’
‘Duncan called me up to his office this morning. He had me close the door and said that he was taking Emily away on holiday for a few weeks this summer. He said that I wasn’t to uit up rough because it would be worse for me if I did.’
‘And you took a big deep breath…like I suggest you always do.’
‘I did…and i paused. I wasn’t ready for this.’
‘But its natural that he would do this isn’t it. I mean the guy dotes on her as much as you.’
‘I know…but he is fucking her as well’
‘We both know that James. You know why this is like it is…’
‘Because she is beautiful and arrogant and just like him!’
‘Do I hear some ire in your voice my friend?’
‘Well….some, I admit. He just told me with that supercilious smirk on his face. It was a look that said ‘just say thank you’ James. I am giving your wife what you plainly cannot’
‘You didn’t say thank you did you?’
‘No…I didn’t’
‘And…’
‘And we got into a conversation. A hard conversation. I said that I wasn’t best pleased about him fucking her. I said that I could cope with you, but this thing was tougher.’
‘and he said..’
‘and he said that i could lump it or leave it. But Emily was going away on holiday with him, that he did expect me to encourage her to enjoy the holiday and that he had spoken to you about it’
‘Ah…its the last bit isn’t it. That I have approved of Duncan taking her away on holiday and fucking her.’
‘I suppose so..’
‘But you’re missing the point here James. You’ve clawed your way through one transition, to surrendering Emily to me, but you haven’t yet to surrendering her to the cuckold mistress lifestyle.’
‘I don’t follow, look please Jezz…’
‘I mean that your mistress will lie with other men, that she will enjoy sex as a pleasant pastime, one that is always with men in her own class.’
‘I coped with the party..’
‘You did…and because you see CC as a mate of mine. You see him as a stud. But its different with Duncan isn’t it. Go on..tell me..’
‘Hmmn, he is my boss at work. Its humiliating’
‘You will learn a lot more about humiliation my friend, Emily has barely started.’
‘Its because…well because he has money and I don’t-leastways not a pile of it.’
‘Emily likes being spoilt, she likes material things. She likes the class of the guy- do you understand?’
‘yes’
‘and you’re used to being outclassed at sex. So now you get used to being outclassed in career as well. You don’t think Emily would sleep with one of your peers or your subordinates do you?’
‘I don’t exactly have subordinates’
‘Exactly my friend…Emily choses the best.’
‘What do I do now?’
‘Well, you ring Duncan and go and say sorry. Ask some practical things about when they plan to go away. Say you will accept things nice and quietly.’
‘All of that!’
‘Yes…all of that.’
‘He may have telephoned my mistress’
‘He may have. Better pray that he hasn’t. Better pray that he understands your first reaction isn’t necessarily the final one. You go and thank him for dating your mistress. You say mistress alright? This isn’t a game James. Yiou can’t pretend anymore that this is a complete duress thing for you. You tell me and you must tell him, that you are used to being pit down by Emily.’
‘Yes…OK, I suppose.’
‘then you take another breath and you remember what i have said before. Understand that you aren’t meant to compete as a male. You are Emily’s lap dog. Think of ways to please her as regards what she does want you to do..’
‘Such as…?’
‘Don’t be stupid James…you’ve got a better brain than that!’
‘Well…I fucking well don’t know Jezz. I fucking well feel useless. Emily gets all she needs with you and him.’
‘Get a stud or something, surprise her, do something that shows how devoted you are.’
‘A fucking stud…but you’re the fucking stud!’
‘I mean in your tongue…’ [Dear God- I shouldn’t have said that. I wouldn’t have had i not blogged what I did to you lot this morning. i rush on..] ‘Forget I said that, just catch your breath, calm yourself and tonight say that Duncan instructed you as regards the summer and that you will of course co-operate.’ [Will he? I haven’t a clue. Emily is out with Mags. Perhaps he might. Perhaps Duncan didn’t ring to express his annoyance or if he did he tried just the land line. Who knows.]

‘This is doing my head in right now. I can’t get the scale of it all. Its so fast, so fast Jezz’
‘I agree [and I do. The stuff going down since Christmas is crazy. They took over a year to get to that point and now its the winter Olympic ski jump. Emily is soaring]. Not tonight, but another night this week, request a honest one to one. Assure her of your devotion and then ask to be kept closer in to the decisions. Ask her to tell you where things are going.’
‘You tell me that. You tell me that we are going to start a set. That you will be alpha and that men like me will be beta.’
‘I tell you yes…but you need to hear it from Emily. This is what she wants too. That’s what you’re wrestling with, the social side of it all. Being outclassed in a quiet bedroom is one thing, being her pet in public…well we all know that this takes time.’
‘You’re right…thank you.’
‘Good…now get back on the phone. Sweet talk Duncan’s secretary for a 10 minute slot and say you’re grateful. If you need to confess a bit, about what you are, do that too. He wants things nice and snug as much as you do. He will listen even if he does think you the saddest soul under the sun.’
‘OK’
‘OK James. Bye.’

What do I say? I knew that this was coming. It was a turn on. I knew that humiliation is deep seated between Emily and James, it is their thing. But there is indeed a pace and scope to all this stuff. This hit James like an avalanche. I orchestrated this in some part so I will too help him get over it. If we need to ease back someway then we will. In all these months James has never had to use the safe word. I don’t intend that he will feel the need to now. The party was a buzz for him, a surprisjngly big buzz. Someday Duncan will be present at such parties. This is what we must work on..gently, incrementally.
Jezz