Marriage Evolved › discussion › Lifestyle Discussions › True Experiences › Progression of Cuckolding for Couple/Change in Feeling

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    • DocVa1
      Participant
        June 9, 2026 at 11:10 am
        Post count: 2
        #126737

        We’re a married couple at a crossroads. Until recently we were very limited in our cuckolding experience. We’re at a crossroads and could use others’ experience and advice, not fantasy.

        Several years ago through a divorced friend of my wife, we brought a guy into our sex life. It started as me primarily just watching them and was very rare. As in just a handful of times a year rare. He ended up moving and that was that and our re-creation of it was mainly just role playing.

        Late last year by chance we met another guy through our extended social circles. After years of not dabbling both my wife and I got the itch again and we threw out a not so subtle hint at him not knowing at the time we’re in a very long list of white couples who were inviting him in. Completely different dynamic than the one other partner who got us started. This guy is the walking essence of a black bull.

        Complicating things since he started fucking my wife is I really like the guy and we consider each other as friends. We’ve been to a couple sporting events together, have beers, etc. Recently we’ve been busy with things in life and he approached me about the opportunity to fuck my wife when I’m not there. Naturally I had mixed feelings at first and talked to my wife about it. She was more open to it initially but agreed we should think about it and talk before we commit. In other words we separated pleasure from the reality of navigating the real life aspects of the lifestyle.

        Since relaying we were in wait and see mode to him we’ve all hung out a few times including watching my wife with him and a few of his friends. It was our first experience with more than one guy. The cuckold, not just hotwife component to our relationship has been kicked into overdrive during that time and it’s a rush of emotions, in a good way for my wife and I. But during that time I’ve had this guilt that I’m still holding out on the thumbs up of him fucking my wife without me. The guilt has increased as the true cuckold behavior of our relationship has increased. I don’t know why that is or if that is a common experience.

        This past weekend as my wife and I talked we were scouring the internet about it and related stuff and saw mention of a ceremonial gesture, like an actual little ceremony, where words are exchanged etc and the bull is basically given to the wife. We talked about it extensively and my reluctance on the subject was partially absolved in a weird way even though it’s just some formally informal event. Once I showed an open mind my wife related she wants the opportunity to have him when I’m not around.

        Has anyone had an experience or have thoughts on this ceremony I mentioned or is that some online fantasy? Given the holding pattern we’ve yet to discuss it with him and ultimately not sure if it will be laughed off.

      • Cathy & Jerry
        Participant
          June 10, 2026 at 11:26 am
          Post count: 303
          #126770

          My wife’s lover and I are also good friends, we go fishing together and work on cars etc. I gave him full access to Cathy at any time he wishes, I’ve even allowed them to travel together as a couple (they are in Hawaii as I’m typing this). If you and your wife are very close, trust each other completely, and you trust him to never try to take her away from you (talk to him about this), then since she is onboard with this as well, go for it. Talk to them both about it and explain that you think it’s nice for them to have sex without you around, but you want to know when it’s happening and you would appreciate hearing about it all. Eventually, like myself, you won’t ask for any info, you’ll just let them make love any time they want, spend time together as lovers, and all three of you will be VERY happy, trust me lol. Good luck, let us know how it goes please 🙂

          • DocVa1
            Participant
              June 10, 2026 at 5:17 pm
              Post count: 2
              #126772

              Thank you Jerry. As mentioned it’s just very different from the one other partner my wife had. It’s exciting but there’s obviously a need to tread wisely and cautiously. We’ve only known him about 6 months but we’ve spent some significant time together outside of the bedroom. I trust him and I trust my wife so that’s a good start. This isn’t his first rodeo so he’s been very open with communication and has moved at our pace.

              We’ve talked since I posted, my wife and I that is, and we’re inclined to give it a trial run. If you would get into some more detail on how the full access conversations went I’d appreciate it. I mentioned the formal get together he talked about he’s done with other couples and I wonder if it’s along the same lines. What are some of the parameters you guys set and stuff related to it.

          • weare1
            Participant
              June 15, 2026 at 6:39 am
              Post count: 5
              #127250

              Your situation is very similar to mine , my wife also has a black bf and we have flirted with the idea of some kind of ceremony

            • Mike & Sara
              Participant
                June 23, 2026 at 5:57 am
                Post count: 19
                #127695

                My wife & I both know & admit this lifestyle differs for all couples. We both admit we never expected how this would change our lives as it has. We had both acknowledged the need to open our marriage to her being with another man because I had started to have some health issues that made it difficult & at times impossible for me to satisfy her. we had many talks about how we would proceed especially even how we would start. Of the many things my wife was concerned about was how it would affect us, our marriage and how we would handle & deal with that. One thing she was really concerned about was if she would be comfortable being with another man if I was present, although we both agreed that we had to be open & honest with each other & I had to always know. I know our solution would not work for everyone but we agreed she could be with other men as long as I always knew. In time I have watched some but definitely not always. One thing we have learned is once you start in this lifestyle be ready to talk about change and be ready to accept your wife’s needs and desires will change.

              • HW4BDayna
                Participant
                  June 24, 2026 at 3:10 pm
                  Post count: 1
                  #128115

                  I’d be careful for two reasons. One, the fact that you’ve had to wrestle with the idea plus why is it not enough for him when your there. Ive given up that control years ago and I wish at least each time I had a semblance of control. It would have made the memories of the experience feel like I took partnand was respected at all times. May not sound important now but be sure before you look back and say I would have felt better if ultimately everyone knew that there was a line in the sand and that was up to YOU!

                  Let him be hot having to wait for her to take her. It’ll make the best sessions like you wouldn’t believe. I would at least look at my options snd strategy(for YOU) going forward.
                  Easier to pump brakes now and feel situation while gaining a level of respect for whats yours “completely”

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