Home discussion Role Discussions Submissive Husbands Sex, or the lack of.

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    • #35630
      Coffee

        I want to keep this as far from “wank” material as possible. So exuse some lack of sexy details.

        I made a few posts in the past around my fiance and I’s breaks from cuckolding. Some of them were due to emotional work, others .. just because we flat were inexperienced, and didn’t address certain issues in the lifestyle correctly.

        One goal of the breaks is usually for us to have some sex for awhile, and try to capture, and hold onto that closeness.

        When we go back, as we have about 4 months ago or so. I notice it always ends up going back to a bit more of a sexless experience for me. In the past, my emotions were mixed on this progression.

        Now , it’s kind of turned into something sexy, and something that I like. For, reasons I’m sure you all can gather. Because I have experienced this before, it isn’t threatening. The anxiety isnt hitting. I have confidence in my partner, and confidence in our relationship. Time and time again, we have proven to have each other’s back, no matter the case. Obviously, cuckolding is a journey.

        So I guess I put this question to others here. Is it “normal” (normal in the sense, that it’s a thing some couples do, but not all) for a cuckolding relationship to evolve in such a way that the cuck is cut off from sex?

        This is a thing I think I may like. Our bull is close friends with us, and is in an open situation with his wife. I trust them both, and at times when I do have a bit of anxiety. I have always felt comfortable giving her, or him a nudge, to reassure me.

        I feel safe. I know I am. But curious minds want to know. You know?

        Thanks for reading!

      • #35635
        Gracie

          Hey, thanks for writing. Every cuck couples situation is a bit different. You have evolved into what suits you well. We have to, very much so.

          In our case, my wife and some of her black boyfriends have feminized me, and I have learned through this process that I make a much better girl, or as some would say, a chick with a dick, than I ever did as a male.

          I really really REALLY enjoy watching my wife with her black boyfriends then doing the cleanup on them after. If allowed by her boyfriends, and most of them do allow it, I love guiding their stiff black cocks into my wife. There is just something so fulfilling about that act.

          I am not allowed any pussy in a sexual sense. Cleaning my wife’s pussy of the cum left behind by her boyfriends is not sexual, it is something different. However, if you are wondering, yes, I am allowed sex, but only in the form of getting my ass pounded by black cock. I am able to accomplish orgasms, not every time, but often, without touching my dick, just from the action of a cock in my ass. To me, after learning to not only accept this but to love it, it is extremely satisfying, more so then when I was allowed to have sex with my own wife.

          This lifestyle is not something I wish to change at all. Neither does my wife, thank God.

          I have been fully feminized, to include growing tits while on female HRT, wearing only female clothing, etc. I go only by my female name, Gracie.


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        • #35653
          Voyeurcuck

            Your story is unique in many ways Gracie but shows what works for you.

            We are less extreme, but we play with a sort of denial before meeting a Bull too. Typical with no penetration two to three weeks before. It’s extremely arousing for both of us to kiss and cuddle and talk about the next cock she’s going to have is not mine.

            My wife likes it a lot and she always squirts while she’s fimaufucjed by the stranger, I think part of the reyis the period without penetration.

            We have no meeting arranged at the moment,but a couple of weeks back se played with outercourse. My ugly hooked on it and I am now on my fourth week without penetration sex and no date when it will come back. Quite exciting in a way

          • #35696
            Coffee

              Wow! Thanks for the responses. It is really cool to see how different everyones personal journeys differ. And you both seem very happy! Which is what we are all trying to achieve. Sexually, emotionally, and spiritually.

              There are pieces of cuckolding I relate to with both of you folks. And parts of it that I think are unique to my experience.

              We are both close to our bull. Any break we have ever had was met with him responding in the following way
              “I understand, I hope you are able to connect in the way you are looking to, I love you man. I am here if
              you want to try again”

              The loving dynamic has always been one of my favorite things. Him and I don’t play, but I have a love for him
              that is unique to itself, because of how responsibly, and the care he shows not just for her, but for me too.

              That all being said. When we are actively cucking, I feel .. not “bad” but taboo anytime I touch her pussy. Watching
              , and seeing the difference in their relationship, and ours. It has helped me along with my submissive nature, and
              although from a vanilla stand point, it seems odd, but I look at them as each others sexual partners. Compersion runs high. And the thought of fucking her, or being the typical guy that “begs” for sex, feels like it’s a trespass on their unique connection.

              One thing I will try to improve, is being ok with “being thrown a bone”. I sort of hated the forced nature of it. But I should think of it as more of a loving gesture from her to me, rather than a “you are just doing this because you feel pressured to or from a place of pity”.

              Just another step in the long journey of self discovery. Disconnecting penetration as the act of love between her and I to other things we love doing with each other has been huge. No longer feeling pressured to fill the “alpha” role society taught me I had to be. And enjoying my real sexuality, which is submissive, and loving.

              Another lesson learned that has over the years, eliminated “dangerous” jealousy. Simple truths

              thought: oh god, she vastly prefers sex with him, and I am entirely inadequate, and I have failed as a man.
              rational thought: You are each others life partners, you share a hundred other things, she is sad any night you aren’t in her bed. You have made each other the best versions of each other. Do you think any amount of bomb dick is going to detour that?

              thought: but, what if we never have sex again?
              rational thought: stop thinking about your dick so much. Even in your scary thoughts? what does it honestly matter? aren’t you the happiest cuddling, kissing her pussy, and getting pegged anyway? aren’t these the things that make you feel the closest? doesnt sex give you anxiety? (it does)

              thought: what if we have another scare some day? what if she gets pregnant with him?
              rational thought: you are adopted. our friend is adopted. were you loved any less from your adopted parents? was he? do you think any of these thoughts will matter when you are teaching a child to read, do math, bring him/her to their first concert as a teen, teaching them to drive? No, you are going to be a parent. And this is the worst case scenario, your fear is irrational.

              thought: am I less of a man?
              rational thought: you are a provider. you are a source of amazing amounts of love. you are a person who educates others. you are also a sub, and a cuck. your preferences sexually do not change who you are as a man. would your friends care if they found out your private secret? or would they tell you, do you? would they forget the times you have bailed them out from situations? love yourself the way others love you.

              Sorry for the self help elements here, but I am proud of my journey. 🙂

              Thanks for reading, and thanks for your responses!

            • #36031
              Cathy & Jerry

                I too have been somewhat feminized, wearing panties, dresses, leggings etc, heels lol. I haven’t had intercourse with my wife in over 8 years. She asked me back then if I would be upset if she requested that we don’t “fuck” anymore because she can’t stand my little pud in her (or attempting to be in her) and her lover was taking care of that need. I agreed that I was useless at intercourse and only lasted about two minutes at best. But I also told her that I am very good at oral which she agreed. So since then I lick her clean and bring her to another orgasm after her boyfriend has finished, and I masturbate to her stories and pictures she has for me or when she’s feeling generous she lets me masturbate as I’m watching her boyfriend and her make love. She allows me to ejaculate but I have to lick it up from my hand, then of course lick her after he’s finished inside of her. We are both very happy with all of this and I doubt that it will ever change since it feels so natural to us now.

              • #36130
                Coffee

                  It’s been a bit! Happy to hear your side!

                  I think we are naturally progressing to a stage somewhat similar to yours. I definately am afraid of awknowledging it though.

                  It’s nice knowing it’s something I’m not exactly alone in though, and isn’t something diminishing. I secretly love it. Why? Not a clue. But I’d bet it has something to do with everything Live has researched here. Something biological makes the whole thing attractive to me.

                  We havnt had sex since we started back up. I havnt felt the need to initiate, other than eating her out. It’s silly, but it feels inappropriate to, I have felt this way before. We have yet to put it to words, but I know it’s a thing we both recognize, and roll with.

                  I don’t harvard any kind of resentment, other than the occasional shame with myself. Which. Tbh, just needs to be gone. It’s not helpful, and gets in the way of living a full life.

                • #36133
                  Thehusband

                    I can undesrtand very well, is familiar to me! My wife and I cam to an agreement about our sex life. My wife met a man and was attracted for him. Our sex always ended with oral sex because either I didn’t have an erection or I had premature ejaculation. You know when a wife needs sex and you cannot provide, but the love exists, we must not be selfish. So, for compersion people like me, I love to see my wife happy and excites me my wife don’t be my female.

                  • #36167
                    Coffee

                      I feel that!

                      I think I’m getting it. Or rather, getting how I feel, and being ok with how I personally get gratification from it all.

                      We have had our talks. Our bull isn’t going anywhere, unless we have to move for work, or if he does. He is an integral part of our life. They are eachothers lovers.

                      I’m coming to peace , and replacing the shame that I felt over that. And feeling more positive about how my personal sexuality fits into everything. I love their partnership. And it has never harmed our partnership. Not actually, only in the unrealistic scenarios I have created in my head.

                      Even if I took cuckolding out of the equation, I couldn’t go back to vanilla sex.

                      Like many here, cuckolding has become a pretty big part of my sexual identity. The crappy part is the negative connotation of it but.. it’s no one else’s business :/

                      On a side note, we had another pregnancy scare , but it turned out negative again. This time, I felt a little worn down, and felt different about it. Like, more of a, how do we prepare, rather than freaking about about the situation.

                      Hell, dealing with it this time didn’t even have as big of a sexual thrill this time. It DID (a fact that I keep very close to myself) but it was the last thing on the docket. It feels more of an, of course that is going to happen versus, I can’t believe that happened.

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