Home discussion Lifestyle Discussions Getting Started Wife Lacking Confidence

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    • #9819
      honestlycurious

        Hello Community,

        My wife and I have discussed cuckolding as a topic on a few occasions. She’s not opposed to the general idea, but has currently tabled the discussion as a “maybe sometime in the future” type of conversation. (my opinion is out of nerves rather than a disinterest)

        She’s a very sexually adventurous person behind closed doors, and she does have fantasies of adding a third person. From that standpoint I’m very encouraged. 

        My concern though lies outside of the bedroom… in public she greatly lacks confidence in herself. She doesn’t view herself as sexy or desirable, and often is a wall flower. 

        My question for the community then, is what sort of activities could we try to start helping her develop self-confidence. I tell her she’s beautiful every day… but I feel hearing it from others would mean more, if that makes sense.

         

        Anyway, any help is appreciated. Thanks! 

      • #11961
        Englishcuckold

          I think it is best if you and your wife decide that sex between you is not going to happen again until she finds a lover.

          It helps that I have an understanding doctor who is, in her own way, a feminist who believes my marriage is an ideal model which should be embraced by more couples. She is also my wife’s doctor and friend. Every three months I am given a shot of Depo-Provera which eliminates most of my sex drive and even controls my fantasies and helps make my marriage work better. The drugs also assure that I can no longer have an erection and, after a few years, I have noticed that my prick has visibly shrunk. I also attend the surgery every Friday morning for oestrogen treatment which normally wrecks my weekend and confuses me until at least Monday. I find it impossible to go out of the house on Saturday and Sunday, but I use the time to clean and do the laundry for the week.

        • #11972
          useajohnny1

            Hi, 

            you sound like you are in the same situation as me at the moment . My wife has a BBC fantasy and now knows that I want her to cuckold me and is curious to do it but seems a little shy / nervous to actually move things forward, this is where it gets tricky. 

            I have previous experience of this life style with my ex wife, she too was very hesitant and no where near as sexy as my present wife and it took a lot to make the first step, however I noticed a change when she stated going online on sites like adult friend finder, this gave her confidence, the Bulls would tell her how sexy she was and how they would like to fuck her.

            to get your wife to cuck you we all need patience

          • #11980
            cucken

              Great topic here guys. My wife also has confidence issues. She puts herself out there and because things don’t work out for one reason or another, she gets hurt and gives up. She asks me to do the looking for her, I think so she doesn’t have to deal with rejection if it occurs. We are polyamorous so she doesn’t want a bull, she wants a long term triad. A triad where I get to share there bed and not partake… 😉

            • #11981
              honestlycurious

                Thank you all for the responses!

                 

                Englishcuckold, I appreciate the response, though I don’t think your suggestion would work well for our situation. We enjoy our sex life and are not looking to be pressured into forcing the issue… I feel this approach would only cause friction and tension for us both, but perhaps for others it would be a more fitting suggestion. 

                Useajohnny1, it’s great to hear others have found themselves in similar spots. I haven’t tried suggesting using any sort of dating site… I think that may come off as a bit odd to her, but at some point an adult chat room might be more up her alley. 

                Cucken, thanks for the compliment on the topic. I’m glad to hear this is something of note to more than myself….Perhaps we can work together to put together a list of ideas to help our wives boost their confidence. I’m sure others will have thoughts as well! 

                I’d like to start by revisiting something we’d tried in the past, where we simply enjoyed a dinner together at a pub. My wife dressed up for the occasion (nothing too fancy) and we paid special attention to any looks other men gave her and talked about it afterward. It seemed a very safe step in the right direction at the time without any pressure to interact beyond simple glances and smiles… it may be worth us trying again. 

                Thoughts? and thanks again! 

              • #12145
                JandGinSD

                  Go out to a club/bar/wherever as a couple but split up there.  She will grow in confidence when men hit her up, buy her drinks, ask her to dance, … If necessary, you can prearrange to have a couple potential suitors be there to make sure she gets plenty of attention.  However, that wouldn’t be best for most as you two should be 100% open to each other on all details for this lifestyle to work without blowing up on you.  If you do have local “cyber” bulls who are interested in pursuing her, she could simply drop into such a public venue to meet them all individually to get a feel for the chemistry and get a self-esteem boost as a bonus.

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