Reply To: Cheating

My way into this was her cheating. But differently. I found out 8 years into our marriage that she fucked another man behind my back the entire time we were engaged. She stopped once we were married and we were happy. As she confessed I got more aroused than I ever had been in the past.

Later on when I expressed how confused and hurt I was she brushed it off due to the time that had gone by and my initial reaction. It became regular role play until we eventually acted on it again.
I’m not wondering how much of this fetish is a defense mechanism for myself. It’s all I masturbate to. She and I have almost no sex life anymore, but are happy otherwise.

I’m very conflicted about it all suddenly and feel emasculated and like I need someone to talk to.
Being cheated on is a way in, but be careful and take care of yourself.