making it happen

Beautifully and articulately written. I have been in a very similar situation for some time and it is definitely THE most recurring fantasy that we play with. She knows that, after she has cum, she can easily get me off by stroking me and talking about her fucking other men. I’ve been in an alpha role my whole life as a quarterback, teacher, father, etc. but, like you, have always been turned on by shifting that power in another direction. I’ve also wondered about how to move this whole thing to the next level and have recently sent my pretty wife (who is built similarly to yours, it seems) copies of emails between me and prospective bulls/lovers for her. She has playfully responded and, I must admit, even if it doesn’t ever come to complete fruition, the fantasy improves as she takes part in it. But recently, I’ve emailed back and forth with a bull who seems to take his time with and respects wives and starts with an erotic massage (after an initial meeting at a coffee shop or bar). My wife, over wine at least, has agreed to do that. I’m ecstatic with ‘cuckold angst’ and hope it does, in fact, happen this fall or winter and who knows, may tempt her for even more. I hope this gives you at least one way to get the ball rolling with your pretty wife. I swear, reading your story above, I felt like I was reading my own diary. Good luck, Mat

I didn’t realize you had also posted here in the forum, Rob. For everyone’s benefit, I’ll post my reply to your original email.

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Rob,

I’d say you’re closer than you think to this finding its own path given her recent behavior. What it really comes down to is her being open to the idea and then interacting with other men from that perspective. Once she adopts a hotwife persona she essentially becomes one – then it’s just nature waiting to take its course.

Continue the talking, but also move the fantasy out of the bedroom. Challenge/enable her to dress sexier day to day with the intent to appeal to other men. Challenge her, when out in public together, to quietly point out which guy she’d ‘take home’. Encourage role-playing about this guy at work. Eventually this will all achieve critical mass and something will happen for you both.

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One of the sexiest benefits of a workplace romance is the day to day potential for them to see each other. Being at work it’s not like they can have sex all day (or even at all in most cases), but they can interact, flirt, touch and even steal moments to kiss. Think of how it will feel to watch her dress every morning knowing she’s dressing not only to look sexy for him, but to give him easier access to slipping a hand under her skirt. This will form the foundation of their courtship and when shared with you, it will form the basis of your foundation as a cuckold couple.

rob,
Another thing you can do at home is to pre-plan her outfits and even shop for a new one or two that she’ll wear to work for him as part of her new persona as a sexually available wife. At home you can have her try them on and you can help her practice how to let him enjoy the best view(s) of her when they are in proximity. For example she can practice crossing and uncrossing her legs to help her dress ride up a bit. You can help her know how far she needs to lean in front of him for him to have the best view of her breasts in her lace bra. You remind her that she can undo another button just for him and then close it again after if need be.

Wow, things are happening fast for you. I’m happy you are making progress with all of this if this is what you want, and it seems it is. I also understand your “cuckold angst” as she went out the door. I”m also supporting my wife’s lunches with her old (boy)friend at work. I have picked out her panties for her when she has gone to see him. She hasn’t had any sex yet, and says she won’t, but I’m not so sure. I told her that, when he gets his upcoming divorce, if she wants to go in and get a good fucking from him, I’ll be here in her panties waiting to reclaim her. As it is, we both don’t want her messing around with him while he’s still married to his wife, who is also our friend. But it looks like that will be over soon. I even called him my wife’s boyfriend to another female friend of ours the other day. It was said in jest, but there was a moment of sexual tension in the air after I said it that felt electric. I’m getting more hopeful all the time that she will, in fact, cuckold me, either with him and/or others. Keep the faith, Mat

Well, whenever it seems like it is running too fast for me, I just back off for a bit and let the feelings come back, and they always have, so far. Sex is no fun if you feel pressured, but is tremendous when there is a flow. Hope you continue to feel the flow, whichever way you go. Sometime I’d like to discuss if you, or anyone, could make a case for cuckolding being a spiritual experience. Seems crazy on the surface, but if it is just sex and then heartache, why go there? But if there is personal growth along with the fun, all the better, it would seem. But that’s for another time. Keep the faith, Mat

Hi Rob.
I’m in a not un-similar position myself. The difference being that my wife has taken absolute control of the cuckold dream now. I never expected it at the outset but it was something I was very aware of possibly happening. As long as you and your wife are completely open about every aspect, you have options.
You feel like what was your initial fantasy has become something your wife has picked up and run with. I think that this is a classic case of cuckolding evolution. I mentioned options and what I mean by this is that if your relationship with your wife is strong (and it has to be stronger than most) then discuss your apprehesion with her. You are at a pivitol point now and there maybe only a couple more opportunities for a “timeout” or to even put the brakes on things completely.
On the other hand, you are both stepping towards a completely strange and new dynamic within your relationship which is bound to get your nerves jangling. You wouldn’t be human otherwise. If you together choose to continue, you can put in place safeguards that will benefit both of you. Make sure that you know the location of their planned rendezvous. Have her ensure that her phone is switched on for the duration. Not for you to call or text her but so that she can make contact with you anytime. She may or may not have talked to her suitor about you but I would hope that she had and in doing so, made him comfortable knowing that she has a husband waiting at home and one that is fully aware of the liason. If he isn’t comfortable with this then there is an element of respect for your wife and her relationship with you that is missing. If things go well on the initial meeting, then further down the road, liberties can be taken by your wife and her suitor. But there HAS to be trust between all three involved, right from the word go.
You may not feel you are in the driving seat any longer but you AND your wife are steering the ship. Or that’s how it should be in the outset. Keep communicating!!

Good luck in your decisions, which ever direction they take you in.

Matt.

It seems to me that there is a big difference between meeting with a guy who you (two) have met on line, but never face to face, and a situation like the one you proposed. Naturally the former situation would almost require a meeting of all three of you to make sure everyone is comfortable. But in the situation where she already knows him and is interested in going to bed with him, she can handle that herself. In fact it might very well blow him out of the water to have you there. As long as she is honest with him about what is going on, I don’t think you should feel so left out in this particular situation. Just hope she is playing this ‘above board’. Good luck and try not to get totally consumed by it. Keep a little perspective so you don’t drive yourself crazy (lol). Mat

So what happened, rob?

Yes, please update us Rob.

Perhaps she could laughingly reply (next time it comes up) that her husband has had ‘cuckold fantasies’ for a awhile now. Let Chris look up what that means and, who knows, he might join in even more. Just a harmless thought. Good luck with things, Mat

This is such a useful conversation and given how long some guys may have to wait to be cucked, I think it deserves the detailed attention that we all give this. There seem several issues here, how much to talk about it/press it with a wife, how to set opportunities so that she can enjoy being with another guy and how to represent this submissive male need as something that still spells devotion to your wife and commitment to the marriage. I think the worse look possible for a prospective cuck is panicked and obsessive male who might explode if she doesn’t get it on with some guy very soon. Its like waiting for Christmas when you are six. You wonder whether ‘he has been’ yet, whether the magic moment is happening. Taken from a wife’s perspective that seems very unsophisticated and perhaps indicative too that you might railroad things when she does start seeing the other guy. So is the knack here one of patient opportunity making, clear sharing of what would turn you on, but then brief explanation too… of why. A very nice guy whose wife fancied dating with me had gently edged his wife to the point where she and i would go out to dinner, but then found she froze on the idea. She had started to wonder just how he saw her, if and when we got it on. Questions bubbled up. Do you want me to be slut? Do you expect me to do it front of you? Is this because I out earn you and you’re now having a crisis? It stopped him dead because he hadn’t spelled out in his own head why he needed this. Sure he pictured watching her take cock, demonstrating his submission to me, but deeper than that he wanted this to happen as an adjunct to what they shared, to keep their sex exciting, precisely because he couldn’t be absolutely sure what she might chose to do. My nice, sincerely nice, husband wanted the thrill of the chase again, and to recreate a rut, where he lost and he fuelled then on admiring the unattainable her.

Sincerely, I am no psychoanalyst but I have seen that in some degree before. Some husbands need to worship their wives and which woman could really resist that wonderful place if it was carefully explained? I said to him that I would invite his wife out, come on to her and that as we dated casually for a while, he needed to work on the worship angle. So this brilliant and attentive husband did that, he admitted how her looks mesmerised him. He told her how good her dress sense was, how naturally discerning she was. This wasn’t just about men and sex, it was about everything- her work, the family relationships, the way she drove a car. It was paced too so that it didn’t seem fawning. He was setting up the narrative of natural progression to cuckold sex. She was mistress in their relationship, that would never change. A woman of such taste would never be a slut. But it was right, it was more than OK that I rang and said that I wanted to borrow his lady to go to the theatre. There came the evening when she whispered to me, ‘Mark wants to share me with you I am sure of it’. I kissed her and said I thought he did too, but she would need to tell him that he would become the junior partner in all this. He would never ever be edged out, but I did the fucking. I remember the excitement in her face when I used those words and the next day she rang to say we should date on different terms. She wanted me to take her to bed and her husband had conceded that this was inevitable.

Thanks for sharing Rob. I hope inputs from an inexpert but thoughtful bull/boyfriend angle help you. I know bulls in the blogs and literature come across as cardboard cut out, machines (luvr excepted!), so a reflection or two more. In the situation above the lady concerned wanted sex to be private at first. But there was a frisson regarding fucking at their house, so she would send him off to the club or something and set a deadline before which he was not allowed to return or to call. She was very demonstrative, very hot from the outset then and I formed the opinion that this was an abandonment that wouldn’t have been possible for her, if we had had been witnessed so early. We fucked all over the house too and it was as if she was making the place our territory as well as theirs. Dressing up when HE was going out said a lot, she has two or three short leather skirts that are clearly hot for him and which she uses to signal that she looked forward to time with me. Now I don’t quiz a woman about the details at such times, but it seemed too that she wanted our sex to be polished, to be just so, before he was allowed to watch. Of course in the fantasy cuck world the sex is perfect first time right?! The bull doesn’t have to learn how to really make her gasp and scream-its all down to a big cock thrusting. Well it ain’t necessarily like that-different women scream for different things and a bull learns (if he has any sense at all).

We shared private sex over the first month or two and to be honest that was my preference too. I wanted to enjoy her and get her to the point where she needed this often. That’s done with what you do in bed, but what you say as well. She needed, wanted, to be in my thrall as it were (I know, that sounds stupidly arrogant-but this is the psychology of the thing sometimes). We dated across town, at a bar or two and that really made her feel sexy-being out as my woman. When we suggested that hubby come out with us and then return home for a threesome she was definitely ready for the witnessed sex. She was giving me ‘cow eyes’ all evening and her husband was responding correctly, admiring her and doing all that I said. It was a very comfortable place for a flesh and blood bull-knowing that I could take her and he would support the fucking-however long and hard it went on. I had him undress her and then lick her pussy whilst we kissed. I had my fingers down there too, opening her labia so he could lick inside. I didn’t plan it that way, but he licked my fingers as I did that. It was very intimate, very co operative. She looked down and was so aroused, that I held out fingers for the husband to suck. He did that and she begged for cock. She didn’t want him close then, co operating in the way that you describe your wife’s wishes. He had to sit on a chair in the corner whilst I enjoyed her. Licking out (the ritual- instinctive back to cave times?) came next and she watched me intently as he did that. Her face was a picture. She seemed to say, ‘look I have no shame…I am yours.’ She didn’t climax on his tongue- it was for her just a chore that she would make him do. I can’t say whether it was different when he tongued her in private, but she never orgasmed, or allowed herself an orgasm on tongue, in front of me.

So what makes the difference? Perhaps a wife needs to know that a husband is fully committed and co operative and that the sex doesn’t equal ‘cheating’. Perhaps the sharing side of things is important, being taken in some way by two men. I can understand that, but from the less than perfect bull perspective, it is harder to handle if its a first time out. I like to be in charge with the lady first. I think in the case of my lady she wanted to say to her very open and caring husband, look, this is happening anyway now…I’ve thought about it, want it and need it. So you can help. It may be how a woman has been brought up to think about sex and relationships. It seems to me though that a would be cuck husband needs to know and respect the woman’s take on this from the start as you have done. Otherwise sorting out an arrangement is so much harder. best wishes, Jezz.

Great post Rob. Married women love to snog their prospective lover’s in front of the husband and the would be bull does get used to it. In truth, later he expects it. Kissing is so intimate, so representative of other penetration. It’s as if she says, ‘look I’m serious, his tongue is inside me.’ What is hotter is still is when a bull eventually takes a wife and he kisses and fucks her at the same time. Stroking a woman long and having her mouth search up for hers really shows her submission, her abandonment to the rightness of the coupling. Its a completing of the circle, she is hooked to him top and bottom. Watching that really does blow the cuck mind. Best wishes, hope things progress nicely for you both. Jezz