WIFE WRITING 4: LOVING YOUR HUSBAND AND YOUR BF

However, I wanted to talk about the possibility of a wife loving a boyfriend more than she loves her husband. This is the part where I am sure I will have some haters, but I am not the only one who feels this way. As many say, or have said, “it’s a different kind of love”, and “in some ways yes, I love my bf more, but it’s different.”

I believe I have come up with a good way of explaining it. I have a chart that I have posted with this write up.

Hubs offers a full rectangle and also makes up the rest of a rectangle that the bf can’t offer. But the bf still offers a full rectangle, as well as many things as a good portion of what the husband offers. But what the husband offers cements the marriage fully and prevents it from being in jeopardy

For me the red part of the rectangle that strictly belongs to my husband is that he has always been stable. He is very sweet and genuine, and very easy to get along with. And we have always been able to be open and honest with each other about everything, without judgement. We have a connection on a different level that I don’t get with other people, in the sense that he gets me and understands me fully. He is always there for me: supportive and caring. He is my best friend, my twin flame, my sister type that I could never let go of. That is the portion of the rectangle that is specifically his. which is the “different” way of love. However, like my graph indicates, the bf offers a larger portion of the rectangle on his own, as well as much of the same things that the husband offers. And I imagine this is a common feeling for most wives.

So yeah, technically speaking, the love a wife has for both men, is “different”. I say different in the sense that, in essence, both offer the same thing. The boyfriend even offers part of the husband’s rectangle. that there is a portion of the other rectangle that only the husband can provide. Both relationships offer emotional needs, but in slightly different ways, because there is indeed that portion of the rectangle that the husband provides that the bf can’t. But that portion he does offer is very much needed and is what makes it so that she will never leave the husband. But literally speaking, the bf offers more as a whole, so naturally, the wife will make the bf more of a priority (the real “couple”). So, “different”, yes…in a small, impacting way. But in all reality, the wife does love the bf more than the husband. But never in a way that jeopardizes the marriage.

I’ve noticed that in more established couples – couples who have been together a very long time and have had a family together and all of that – are less inclined to feel this way. Instead, this outlook I have shared tends to match more with the younger couples (mainly 20’s-30’s, and sometimes 40’s). I think it’s because we tend to have a more progressive/aggressive way of approaching the sexless-cuckold-marriage.

And grant it, there are many paths that couples can take with this lifestyle. Some cuckold-couples do not have a sexless marriage. Some may feel that a wife shouldn’t have a steady bf or have feelings for a bf and that it is just sex and nothing more. Some feel, that at most, a wife should love her bf equally, or love her husband a little more. None of these views are wrong. They are just different. I know that the way my husband and I live the lifestyle, may not work for other couples. And that’s ok. Each couple must find what works for them. And as long as both the husband and wife are happy, and all the needs are met and it works, then that’s all that matters. I just wanted to share this and see what others felt or had to say.