Reply To: Breaking a cuck

While I understand this feeling that a “handjob” should be the least you get, I totally resent the entitlement that you deserve one just for being married. You have to earn sexual contact. Every situation is unique, but for me at first I was giving him pity handjobs, because I felt guilty denying him sex, but that made both of us feel dirty after… he knew it wasa chore for me and I resented his demand so he took over and I would tell him details or dirty talk for him. But after a while I felt used. I’m just here to serve your needs? I would love to have sex, but he can’t do that. We try and even as I try to enjoy it he would give up knowing it wasn’t working so I feel like I tried and gave in the first 16 years of our marriage. I tolerated and accepted mediocre sex and not having an orgasm from sex and was fine with it. Then HE introduced a large toy and woke me up to what I was missing, but a toy is not the same as intimacy and the more it stretched me out the more I craved that feeling and the less he felt inside me. So he stopped having sex with me because he saw how much I preferred the full feeling. That was HIS choice. Then he suggested I have sex with my ex and I did and it was amazing and hubby and I have not had sex since because HE can’t stay hard anymore due to feeling inadequate… so we stopped. Now he wants handjobs and dirty talk, but after a while I stopped seeing him sexually at all and more like a best friend so being naked with him started to feel awkward. I feel no desire as I watch him stroke his little thing and I resent him begging me for details about what sex is like with a real man. I love him, but the more I did that the more pathetic in a negative way it became for me. I would rather just share as it feels natural, share our lives and forget about sex for him entirely. That’s just me though. Everyone is different. A year ago I didn’t feel this way.