Re: Our “hotwife path” up till now. Pls advise what’s next

@Mihotwi said:
This has been very helpful… My husband and I have been together since high school.. 30 yrs to be exact… We started exploring alternative lifestyles about a year ago..through a swingers site. We had a couple of play dates and lots of conversations. We’ve discovered that its much harder to get the female partner of relationships to buy in to the swinger life. Our interest in hotwifing developed as an outcome from  some threesomes and the fact that couples were hard to come by..(translation..husband. wasn’t getting much action) my husband confessed that h

When watching me with these other men he had mixed emotions.. Dismay and jealousy but also lust and desire… We have found that he likes to hear about my dates (I’ve only had a couple) and is horny as hell when I get home.. I’m a little unsure on where to go from here…because he’s had these varying feelings I’m hesitant to be too descriptive but then he says he isn’t “getting anything ” from the arrangement.. How do you know if hotwifing is something he really enjoys and what can we do to I sure that we booth get what we need out of the relationship. Thanks 

I think you need to have a long deep conversation. See it sounds like to me, you two wanted to be swingers and he wanted to get action too but was not getting it. I personally feel this is why you see many couples who become swingers fail because they went into it thinking they both would get action, or have threesomes/ swap and so on and it can turn into a competition or resentment because you are getting laid and he is not when you go to a swinger party or event. 

This is only my observation as my wife and I have been to many swingers clubs and events, although we have always made it clear it is about her pleasure, and the pleasure I get out of her enjoying herself. See I never wanted action or to get anything out of it sexually. Sure I enjoy it when I do but I enjoy more the mental pleasure I get and the physical pleasure I get from my wife. That makes her a hotwife and me a cuckold. We are not swingers and in fact have agreed that I do not have sex with other women even at swinger events unless my wife initiates it…… funny though becuase that has not happened :). We do enjoy the occasional MMF threesome though. 

Not sure if this helps?