Does submissive mean, sissy?

Your gender identity needs to be driven by yourself, not by others, first of all. Secondly, being submissive doesn’t make one feminine any more than a woman being dominant makes her masculine.

There is also a difference between a male who enjoys dressing like a woman to feel he’s in a role of a woman and a man who dresses in feminine things as a means to emphasize his submission as a male.

Where you fall has to depend on your own feelings.

Hi agree with Luvr, I am submissive to dominant women and men however I would not consider myself a sissy and have no interest in any sissy type play.

I define my maleness by amongst other by being generally equal.  I do find that I feel submissive to men more endowed than myself and/or to men that can pleasure my wife better than I

I had this problem, My wife encouraged me to be more feminine and as I was stopped having sex with her except orally I have come to accept the roll. They then encouraged me to wear panties, but I am now getting to love the sexy feel of female clothing and want to wear more. My problem is I get so horny I want to masturbate all the time. They do not know about this but I have ordered a male chastity device to control myself. I am not sure where my wife and her lover will take this but I am happy to see what happens.

I do not feel like a sissy and still have the urge for sex and find ladies very sexy but I accept my place and am enjoying it every day. if it pleases my wife I will try it.

Know what feels good to you and go with it.  You don’t have to use others’ labels to identify yourself.  I find that once I started thinking in terms of a label, e.g. submissive, then I feel like I have to keep working to conform to it even though it may not apply in many ways, then it becomes more like a rule for judging yourself.  So not very helpful, in other words.  I also find the need to be open to my self-image changing.  Some days I enjoy feeling like a cuck, some days I don’t.  

My cuckold life started with crossdressing which she detected and understood my thoughts and my mental make up more than me, It suited her she was a naturally dominant woman, that led to me getting cuckolded and eventuslly sissyfication, where all my manhood completely eliminated and me sissyfied

The turning point in my marriage was when my wife had a lover over to watch a movie. She asked me to stay, which is unusual because she normally wants to be alone when she is with Alex. He is quite well endowed, very confident and a complete alpha male. Their relationship is strange. He never takes her out, except once to a swing club and basically comes over in the afternoon and uses her as a fuck toy. Nevertheless, she feels quite strongly about him and sort of revels in being a submissive slut when he is around. During the evening, and after a number of glasses of wine, she took his cock out and starting sucking it. I was in a chair across the room. He looked over at me while she was sucking on the head of his cock and told me to come over and suck his balls. I had never done anything with a man until that point but I obeyed his order and kneeled next to my wife and took his balls in my mouth and sucked them while Heidi was working on his cock. He came shortly after that in her mouth and told me to go back to the chair.

After that incident my wife began treating me differently and I knew that she had lost total respect for me as a man but she still viewed me as her husband. The next day she went out and bought me a nightie and some pantyhose to wear in bed at night when we slept together.

I’m not sure if being a supportive cuckold turns you into a sissy or it just brings it out of you. When I was young I always considered myself as manly. Having been an unwilling cuckold with cheating girlfriends, I don’t remember that it made me feel feminine knowing my girlfriend who I didn’t want to lose was always having sex with other guys. However, now that I’ve come to accept who I am as a cuckold and my wife and I living the lifestyle, I have seen changes in me that I never recognized before. 

Since taking on our roles in 2013 as a cuckold couple with times in chastity, I find myself thinking feminine thoughts or at least softer thoughts. I quit biting my nails so they look nice and manicured. I get manicures every now and then. Overall I am more meticulous of my grooming, though I never was a slob anyway. But what I do feel that is happening is a change in mentality of how I want my wife to see me. When I am in chastity especially, I have a need for my wife to see me less masculine as if I want her to think less of me so that she will think even more of her lover as a true bull. I find myself making comments to her about how small my penis is, or how I’m her house bitch. She has slowly come to taking on these terms and is making them a reality in our daily dialog. Having her acknowledge I have a small penis was difficult because she loves me and was so afraid it would hurt me. It took awhile to get her to understand that her recognition of my small penis actually makes me happy. The only reason I can think of why it makes me happy is because I want her to think less of me so she’ll think more of him.  Now it seems the more she acknowledges me as less manly, the more feminine she treats me. She said for me to be naked in an apron before she gets home from work. It wasn’t frilly or anything, in fact it is my cooking apron. She was pleased seeing me in it while I was ironing her uniforms.  She even said I look sexy as she rubbed my tush saying we should go to the costume store for a maids outfit. I don’t think she was serious but it made me have an erection. It does seem that being a cuckold can bring the feminine out that’s in us. All I can say is that I may feel less manly now, but I feel whole as a person.

I’ve become a sub to my wife and her bulls  and my role as a cuckold has evolved. I’ve never been able to fully satisfy her sexually although my oral skills are pretty good. I no longer have vaginal intercourse with her although I’m allowed anal intercourse when she or her bull wants it. I’m usually in a chastity device now and all my pubic hair is shaved and I wear women’s panties although I don’t dress as a woman and I still don’t feel like a sissy.  In the outside world I like to keep my identity as a real man  but she now seems to want to feminize me a little more. She’s now instructed me to remove most of my body hair with the exception of the hair on my arms. For us, we seem to be moving closer to what I see as ‘classic cuckolding’. I few months ago she had met get a cuckold tattoo. It’s a pair of antlers but it’s on my inner thigh so it’s only visible when I’m nude or wearing panties, or a speedo swim brief.

I think it’s really a matter of personal preference.  Sissy has evolved a lot like cuckold has, in the sense that it’s more of a fetish paradigm than a matter of dynamics between a hotwife and her cuckold husband.  I have been a cuckold nearly all of my sexual life with a variety of women; two of them wives.  Not a sissy, just a man who women tend to cheat on.  Of course, over the years I simply embraced it and eventually talked my current wife into fucking other men.

It took a while to talk her into it, but now after about nine years, she has several men, and has no qualms about telling me she will be home late, or not at all.

I have been in a cuckold relationship with my wife for the last three years. And I must admit that being a cuckold has made me more submissive, or more appropriately i have always been submissive and being her cuckold has bought it out and reinforced my submissiveness. In the last year i have left my job and have become what can appropriately described as being the house husband. Even though it took me some time but with her guidance i have now become quite use to doing all the household chores, from cooking, cleaning and laundry. But she does also help me its not that she just leaves it all for me to do, she is actually quite an understanding partner. My wife has strings of lovers but only special ones are invited to our home, and when they are here, I guess i am very lucky in the sense is that she really enjoys me being present when she is with her lover. Also even though she took some time to get used to it, but now enjoys me serving her and her lover. She likes the fact that I am always looking to entertain her lover, by getting the drinks or seeing if he needs anything (Nothing sexual). Also preparing the bed for them, and her favourite part is me cleaning the bedroom and changing the sheets after he is gone. I have been in chastity for the last six months and this is something also which she was skeptical at first about but has come to really enjoy now. She has also a very submissive streak in her and so I understand and appreciate it is sometimes hard for her to be the DOMMEE for me. The thing I wanted to ask this forum is that, we have not engaged in any dress play, even though in bed we are more like lesbian lovers, as our sex is more oral then anything else. Though she still loves penetration from me and I am not completely excluded from that. I have sometimes indicated to her about my interest in dress play but only vaguely, but i have realized she has no interest in it. And as any submissive I do think that my pleasure will only come if it arouses her. But there is this fantasy in me to engage in some sort of dress play like being in a nightie when her lover comes over and i am in the guest room and in my cage. I have thought about going to bed in a nightie. I have not shared it with her as I still don’t think it is something that arouses her, she has always told me that she loves to see me naked in my cage only sleeping in the next room when she is with him. But this fantasy of mine is not going away, I do not know what to do, should i bring it up again? or just let it be my own dark fantasy as she is not into it.

I have been a cuckold for 12 years and been cut off of vaginal sex with her for 6 years. Since she cut me off (which I agreed to and very much wanted) I have been wearing panties. I only wear big boy underwear when I go to the doctor or anywhere else I may have to disrobe. When her lover comes over I greet him at the door wearing babydolls and panties and hand him a beer. I then take him to the bedroom where she’s waiting for him most of the time. The start of the sex with them begins with me guiding his cock into her pussy then thanking him for fucking her the way she deserves to be, then I leave the room. I have found that I don’t like the feeling of regular underwear anymore. My panties (all made for men) are so soft and comfortable, and I even feel they look very cute on me lol. Yes I’ve become more sissy but I’m happy with that as is my wife. Even her lover tells me I look cute enough to fuck which makes my wife laugh and I think sometimes he means it lol. Being a Cuckold sissy is just a level you take yourself to, not what you are just because you’re a cuckold. If you want to become more of a sissy and wear panties from now on, just tell her the truth during a time you’re both in the mood to talk and listen. You can tell her that it doesn’t make you gay, it just makes you much more feminine and you hope she can understand and help you to feel better about doing it. Let us know how it works out for you.

Thanks so much Cathy & Jerry for taking the time to reply to my post, and sharing your experince with me. Yes i now do understand that being wanting to be a cuckold sissy is just a level that I think I want to take myself into, and being so comfortable in being the house husband I think plays a part into it. She just also proposed and bought me some very loose fitting special pants as she refers to them as special dresses to wear in the house. I do not know if she is now slowly starting to warming up to the idea or not, and now fully understands and appreciates my role in the marriage. I wander if its time to press for me to make more changes, or as you said that to talk with her more about what I want. I just don’t wanna upset her and do something or ask for something she does not want to, and just does it because I want it. As my experience is based on her wanting it, which I guess also other submissive cuckolds understand as our experience is centered around our wives.

Simply state that this is the next part of Cuckolding that you would like to move to but only if she’s ok with it. Ask her if she would be happy to see you in panties and acting more of the part (a sissy boi). Tell her that you would like to feel more feminine in your role as a Cuckold and would like to know if she thinks she’d like you to be more feminine, especially when her lover is with her. Personally speaking, both my wife and her lover didn’t know what to think of it the first time I brought it up, but now my wife can’t think of me being anything else but a sissy boi, and her lover thinks it’s great 🙂

I don’t think it does. But I agree With Luvr that these are individual matters you determine/define yourself. I don’t feel all that submissive as a person generally but do feel a certain deference to my wife that I really wish to see manifested more in our sex life. She can be very demanding and responsive but there’s no question she enjoys submitting and being “taken” in bed. It amazes me that it took me so long to truly realize that. I can do it sometimes. My doing more of it in recent years has propelled us to the best sex we’ve had together. But I have little doubt a more naturally alpha sexual male could take it, and her, even further, even higher. And I want that. For us.

While Jan has never sissified me in front of her boyfriend(s), she has however dressed me in panties and stockings when alone though. I have also been threatened me with me having to wear them when her boyfriend does call round. Obviously this would have a real effect in diminishing any remaining vestiges of supposed manhood that is left.

Jan (along with various lovers) have however humiliated me on many occasions, I am caged as a rule during any sexual activity whether I am physically involved or not, I have done all the things that good cuckolds are expected to do for their respected wives and lovers. OK it’s not quite sissification but orally servicing your wife’s lover is pretty close and very damning as to how her boyfriend views you. Although 2 of Jan’s ex lovers would talk to me friendly she always insisted they regarded me as nothing but a sissy cocksucker, just there to serve their needs. They had no respect for a cuckold. To them any manhood and dignity was long gone.

However, I am if I am honest I very happy with the situation. Initially I wasn’t sure about my role. There is a lot goes through the head of a guy who is in the process of accepting that moving forward he will be a long term cuckold. However slowly but surely I have come to enjoy my place in Jan and any respective lovers life. If I was to be feminised I am sure it would be in the best interests of all involved. I am there after all to please them rather than look for any satisfaction myself.

I do think its very much being content and happy with surrounding events and all parties have to respect this. I do think though it’s almost natural for a cuckold (however male he is outside the confines of the cuckold environment) to start to to move towards a sissy role in the bedroom particularly when faced with a much better alpha male who is enjoying his wife. The wife, Jan in this case will naturally start looking at you as being so much less than a man because of the submissiveness being a cuckold entails.

So I personally think while yo can be a submissive without being a sissy there is an overlap and there is a direction of travel. At some point the vast majority of submissive cuckolds will cross the line and become sissified to one degree or another by either words, what their made to wear, how they are spoken to, or what even is thought about them after their respective duties are completed.

The longer you are a cuckold the more likely that you will be looked at as a sissy.

My humble view. M

Part of the challenge in discussing this is what it means to be a sissy. Before the contemporary definition of cuckolding took hold, a sissy could be any male who simply didn’t meet some subjective standard of masculinity as determined by the accuser. This practice is analogous to any woman being called a ‘slut’ by anyone who chose to judge her based on a perceived understanding of her character based on behavior or even just appearance.

In the case of a male not being perceived as an alpha male – that should classify them simply as a beta, which is what 90% of us are anyway. No one is born an alpha – alphas are promoted to such a role through recognition of their qualities by social peers. One groups alpha doesn’t mean he’s an alpha to anyone else – that has to be earned.

On the other end of the scale are males who choose or are relegated to tasks and roles most commonly associated with females. These males aren’t actually beta males, they are gammas and this dynamic exists throughout much of the chimp and great ape social structures.

Sissy has come to imply its own meanings and culture now and sadly it’s mainly associated with gays and bisexual men more interested in other men than they are in women and men. This is why I am sensitive to the topic in the chatroom – I don’t want this to be a venue about gay male interaction – there are other places for that. But, I do want to foster discussion and provide some clarity to elements in play within the lifestyle.

When being a sissy is an element of the lifestyle, I entirely understand and have no criticism of that, but when being a sissy and feminization, plus ‘service’ to males is the focus of someone’s fetish, I do have a problem with it and feel this is not the venue for such discussions or interactions.

I’m also not implying this thread or those involved fall into this category, I just wanted to add my perspective on what I feel being a sissy really means vs how it is applied these days.

I do not believe it does. In my case it has more to do with a level of humiliation and even more about control. When I arrive home I enter through the garage and change into the outfit she has me wear when in her home.

This is all fascinating to me. I began semi interested in crossdressing. The thought of an alpha taking charge and humiliating me while “taking” my wife is an incredible rush for me. I now think of nothing else. Strong alpha men excite me as does a beautiful women.

I would say that being a submissive does not necessarily mean you also have to be a sissy, but think the two are often linked. I would also agree with one poster who felt that being a submissive, even if not a sissy to begin with, naturally moves you in that direction.

That’s true in my own case. Although a cuckold from the beginning, and recognizing that I was a submissive, as I’ve become even more submissive I’ve found myself becoming more of a sissy.

My wife has made it clear from the beginning that she prefers erotically dominant men. Men who, as she says: “Know what they want from her, make it clear to her what they want, and make it clear that they are going to take it, and do!” She’s always made it clear that I was a failure in that regard, and that was one of many reasons why she turned to other men for her satisfaction. She likes to be used, and I’ve always found it most exciting when she was with a man who used her. I loved getting the bedroom ready for them, bringing them drinks, and being made to sit and watch while the man satisfied her in ways I never can. It was even better if he was verbal about it, humiliating me by telling me how wet and tight her cunt was, or how he loved making her cum so hard. My submissiveness really came to the front when she or the man would order me out of the bedroom, or when she’d tell me she was having someone over and wanted to be alone with him (or that he wanted to see her alone), and I’d have to leave while he was there.

From the beginning, too, my wife knew I was bi, and that I loved sucking cock. When she’d have men over who were ok with that, it was a real thrill to me to have her tell me to get them hard and ready for her…that progressed over time into me cleaning her after they were done..even better was when I’d get to clean their dripping cocks after they were done with her!

And yet through a lot of that, the thought that I might be a sissy didn’t enter my mind. Until one day something clicked – I realized just how much I was turned on by being submissive to the MEN who came to enjoy themselves with my wife. That did it..almost as if a door had been thrown open. Suddenly, I realized I could easily be a sissy for those men…and that I wanted to be a sissy for them! I wanted to serve them, to have them use me for their pleasure. Up until then, I’d always told my wife that I was only interested in sucking cock, nothing else…and then there was the intensely arousing night when I admitted to her that I wanted to be fucked as well. I was rewarded for my honesty when she told me that was the hottest thing I’d ever told her, and that she wanted to see me fucked…and wanted it to happen often. I went on to tell her about my need to serve men, to be used by them..she loved that, and said she wanted me to become a cock slut, just as she knew I was.

So now I realize and freely admit that I have traveled a long road to becoming some type of a sissy. I often wear panties under my clothes, and have lately come to admit that I would really enjoy servicing a man while dressed as a woman…something I used to deny. I’ve also come to realize that that aspect of my sexuality has always been there…it just took a while for me to recognize it! So for me, being submissive does mean being a sissy as well.

After 24 years, my Goddess and owner has decided she wants me to be her wife. She knows I will never be a man, because I’m bout. I then realized she was right as always, I’m transgender mtf. So now we’re in the process of my transition, through medical community, starting with hrt for me. She feels that next year will be the time to have my testicles removed, so I stop producing testosterone altogether and will be a better fit for her choices for me. I’m so relieved to have a strong wife who knows what she wants!

My Wife and I have yet to Enter into a Cuckold Relationship/Marriage But I Consider Myself Both Submissive and a Sissy. Although this admission is only to a Select Few and not to our Family, Vanilla Friends, Or Coworkers. Yet this also holds true to my Crossdressing that has been a part of my life since a young boy. My Wife knows of my love of Feminine and Frilly things,and my Love of Women’s Boots and Shoes of Which 95% of what I wear daily. That said though I Feel that in the Cuckold Lifestyle which in and of itself Non-Mainstream but becoming more Prevalent is not readily talked about in the everyday Social Setting. Still for those who are into Cuckolding, whether as the Cuckoldress/HotWife/Vixen, Cuckold/Stag or Bull if You and those around you are Comfortable in whatever Role then who are others to Judge. If my Wife Ever Decided to Embrace the Cuckold Lifestyle, and She and Her Bulls were Comfortable with Me Being Present and Even More So Participating I’d Love Nothing Better than Being Dressed Completely EnFemme from Head to Toe, possibly a Sissy Maids Outfit, to Serve and Service Her and Her Bulls at Their Discretion. What it All Boils Down to is That For Everyone Involved as long as You’re Comfortable, it’s Consensual and Most of All Funfilled then Who Cares 🥰🥰

I was a sissy long before I became interested in being cuckolded. At first the textbook middle child, father issues and begging for attention, I’ve never felt as masculine, watching my brothers play fight and when I tried to join in things always fell apart. I tried wrestling, sports, etc, but always felt extra touchy. My first sleep over, my friend had sex with me, and I was hooked. I’ve enjoyed more men before I turned 19 than girlfriends before or since. For me, this was an avid hook for attention, the thought that my body could make a man like that lose control, to orgasm before even touching me, certainly gave me a sense of submissive seduction I will never regret. Then I met my first sexual girlfriend, at 19 I was working in a kitchen, we flirted a bit for months, then one drunk night she made out with me, then took me to her apartment, there I learned her boyfriend was constantly out of the city, but she had her limits and after sex I slept on the couch. Most nights we were together, she trained my BDSM experiences. I’ve had more female nanny’s teachers, grandmothers in charge, that being submissive in any relationship was easy for me. Though I knew she had a boyfriend, I doubt he knew about me, and she made sure of that.

I’ve topped upon request, and have tested limits. But being an attention whore, I’ve found sex more a tool than my preffered goal. I’ve been locked in chastity for over 6 years, and though I would f’k a cactus just to get off, I am learning sex never was something I want, more something it needs.

listening to a best friend fuck his girlfriend in the next room in high school, listening to my girl friends complain about their assertive boyfriends, I’ve never felt jealous, why would I when the girl of my dreams slips of and enjoys a man in ways I could never fulfil? Being a cuckold for me is knowing she is her own person, she enjoys sex in ways I can’t. She enjoys men like I have. It’s not so much about that cucckold angst, but I do admit its still there. especially when I’ve begged to watch, and know he’s not giving her the attention she deserves.

I am a sissy, I’m easily open to being cuckolded, but I’m currently single, and my ex is now my room mate again, but though I help her at certain un-roomate like situations, I have no qualms if she decides to go there, do that, or never unlock me again.. though that hole in that tree trunk looks like it will do in a pinch…

im submissive by nature, always been cuckolded but Ihave to admit sissification bring a lot of positive things in my marriage, my wife decided to stop having sex with me long time ago but she have a guilt feeling about seen me always with an erection and not giving me sex, I always accept her desitions and been submisive, small and premeture allow me to accept all, with my sissification shes not in guilt anymore, no Im in bra and panties all the time no erections anymore because shes giving me hormones and her lover is more confortable too looking at me as a sissy. I dont get it hard anymore but i still have orgasms Im a lot more calm, sweet and happy.

I’m ever submissive and do tow that line of being a sissy, or at least I’ve been trending that way. My wife won’t really be into it, though.

Generally, I’d say not.

My wife would loves manly and would never put up with me being a sissy, that is why she became the lover of the manly boy next door and I was never a sissy but the clear beta in our threesome