Originally, a cuckold referred to the husband of an unfaithful wife. Implied was that the husband was raising children not his own or at least his wife’s infidelity would lead to such. The word was coined from the cuckoo bird of which certain species lay their eggs in the nests of other birds to be raised by their unwitting parents.
The term wittol, a very old English word, refers to a husband who is aware of his wife’s infidelity and is either resigned to it or lacks the leverage in the marriage to do anything about it, but in no way did the term imply a wittol enjoyed the situation.
Neither of these terms fit the contemporary lifestyle of cuckolding which is defined by a hotwife, a wife who is sexually liberated outside the marriage, and a cuckold, a husband who not only knows of his wife’s coupling outside the marriage, but is both encouraging and supportive.
Some find the term offensive, focusing only on the implied reference to an animal, but if you consider the role of a bull in ranching, you’ll earn a greater appreciation for the term. Among livestock, the bull has a singular purpose: mating with the females. This role lends itself well to cuckolding where the ‘bull’ is invited into the marriage to perform a singular role of sexually servicing and being serviced by, the cuckold’s wife.
Bulls and Doms can coexist for the same couple quite well as each have a slightly different focus to their roles. As a Dom, I have invited bulls to enjoy the wives of couples submissive to me.
The term bull can also be used in a general way to refer to any male involved with a couple regardless of his specific role (bull, boyfriend or Dom). Just as a General is also still a soldier, but the reverse isn’t typically true, a Dom is also a bull.
A Dom is a bull who has both an assertive personality and experience leveraging that perspective with submissives. In the case of cuckolding, a Dom would need to be familiar with handling both spouses of a cuckold marriage. Many mistake an assertive or aggressive ‘bull’ as being a Dom simply because they are demanding and/or bossy – this isn’t the case. Some may be on the path to becoming a Dom as they learn more about the mental and emotional needs of submissives, but others, more often than not, are simply being selfish. A real Dom accepts and enjoys the responsibility of ensuring the submissives needs are seen to and not just use them selfishly.
The acronym BDSM actually stands for three concepts which are related but also separate:
- Bondage: refers to the enforced sense of control/lack of control brought by being bound
- D/s: Dominance and submission: our natural tendency to lead or follow based on our basic nature as an individual and our perception of those around us
- S&M: Sado-masochism. Probably the most misunderstood, nearly everything the vanilla crowd, those who aren’t a part of any ” alternative” lifestyle doesn’t ‘get’ often gets stuffed into this pigeonhole. S&M, for most, is more about sensation and control than it is about actual pain.
The body simply interprets sensation differently when aroused.
Take a swat on the bottom. If you’re simply walking by and someone swats your bottom – it stings and is a shock, but when you are aroused, that very same swat will produce a decidedly pleasurable sensation. How hard a swat you can take before it becomes more uncomfortable than pleasure varies per person and is one of the primary responsibilities of the Dom(me) in charge to discover.
submissive vs. slave
Again, opinions vary, but my perspective on these terms is very divergent. I tend to view a slave as someone accepting of or seeking a particular type of experience as a submissive – typically more extreme and full time whereas ‘submissive’ is a more generalized term for someone who prefers to not be in a leadership position.
Being a ‘slave’ should always be a progression and a role served for someone who has earned that level of trust over time.
hotwife marriage vs. cuckold marriage
[link to full article on the topic] The difference between a hotwife marriage and a cuckold marriage is similar to the comparison of a bull to a Dom – the difference is primarily the depth to which this experience is explored. A hotwife couple is one where sharing her is more a ‘hobby’ of booty call sex. A cuckold marriage is more invested in the exploration of D/s dynamics within the sharing.
I think the fact that she is discussing it with you means she wants to. Otherwise why not just tell her bull it is out of the question? If I am correct in my suspicions, then she probably will let him share her without letting you know. My rule with my wife is that whatever she wants is always up to her and if she winds up regretting it I will be there for her if she needs me. You see to me being a cuckold has always been about my wife’s pleasure. That’s not to say I don’t draw boundaries for what I will tolerate. I always let my wife know what my boundaries are and if she choses to ignore those boundaries there may be decisions I have to make I otherwise would not. This is one of those things however that would not be a boundary issue fro me
My first time, my wife made me masturbate into the toilet, which she quickly flushed, so i would not be sexually obsessed. She passed away about 7 years ago, have been very confused/alone.
Being fully Cuckold couple am told to do the house work when my wife is out on date’s, and if she is away for weekend or longer with her Dom. I given so much money for food, and kept in chastity, as they take they keys for chastity device. My wife Dom made out a contract that is very strict that I have to stand with, and going onto the lifestyle I knew what to expect, and found it a wonderful that I have ever did.
Getting my wife ready for her Dom, and seeing her walk out the door hand, and hand with him am not sure what they do as she never ells me when she is away, but she very happy.
I dont see a definition of stag
Our marriage roles are reversed from the classic vanilla model. My wife runs the finances. I have an allowance of $100.00 a month for myself. All other expenses are reported for approval, much like a business. The house is hers. She calls what the vanillas call a master bedroom the mistress bedroom. This is not because she is the D/s Mistress, but because of the implied gender superiority of the male.
As the more submissive partner, the chores are given to me. I am responsible for the upkeep of the house and grounds. I do the laundry, pick up the dry cleaning and, when we eat at home, cook most meals. The term now is house husband. I like that.
Though there is no question I am the submissive and at times the servant, I would not call me a slave. Can we call what I am the house cuckold?
i work from home my wife works downtown and has to travel occasionally
Her regular at home keeps her happy most of the time
On travels to a branch odffice she has a coworker who occupies her evening in the hotel.
I have been told very few details but has said he is wonderful in bed…and happens to be black..her regular is white so not black only hotwife
I would like to know about my wife being shared. Her black bull has suggested to her sharing her with another.
She and I have talked and I am hesitant to agree. Comments, advice appreciated.
this needs to be discussed with wife. as we enter a wider area. where does sharing stop? one friend? later several? if she desires this ? we need to talk with her why. is it bulls? hers? both? communication is needed plus telling her our hesitations and worries.
how dod we feel for example when entering cuckold life? is this a natural extension ? or are we feeling we have no control and losing part of the close relationship we have with partner etc
Wooow lucky cuck
I think if she wants to do it, then you should not try to stop her. Obviously her bull thinks highly of her ability to please and is offering her to another. I would take it as a compliment to her and to you for sharing her across 2 different men.
i have to agree , if your wife agrees than you should not try to stop her. you must be flattered to share with another man so way not let other man enjoy her as well. I would take it as a compliment to her as well .
Is he also her boyfriend?