Re: Completely Denied

Well I am always a bit reluctant to offer advice to others which may change their behaviour. For what it is here is my answer. Firstly marriage was not designed to be exciting or even to develop companionship. Marriage is an institution which ahs developed over the years to insure the smooth running of society and the rearing of children. It is a good thing and it works for society as a whole and long may it last.However it is not created for you or your wife’s excitement In fact most successful marriages become boring by their very nature. In fact the more boring it becomes it may be the most stable.Men develop  a desire for golf or gardening or one of many male persuits. They also become good fathers, responsible. But, you want excitement. This comes from the different, the strange, the forbidden fruit a sense of mystique. Sexual activity as a function brought down to that level is no more exciting than eating breathing or any other biological necessity.Your sex life seems to be functional. Nothing wrong with that in marriage as, think about it, marriage institutionalises sexual activity, keeps it safe.As long as both partners are committed and would never stray it is not bad for society to keep sex in it’s box. In fact if you and your wife  loose interest through time after producing some children this is perfect for the institution as you can concentrate on rearing the kids without any constant sexual desires disturbing the whole thing.

Your desire to cuckold is a desire to add mystique to your wife. Even though you appreciate that she is sexy desireable and so on you seem to not have the burning desire you once had. Therefore you wish to return to a pre marriage state where desire ruled and you liked it. You can only do that if she samples another man and then essentially she is not entirely yours. That is what it is all about. Nothing wrong with it but you have to ask yourself how will the marriage pan out. can you really live in a constant state of arousal and concentrate on being a father and functioning properly. Maybe so but sopmething to think about. Long term maybe boring is not that bad.