Marriage Evolved › discussion › Role Discussions › Submissive Husbands › Limits › Re: Limits
LuvrEveryone should have limits. Even those in the D/s or general BDSM realm who consider themselves slaves and devoid of personal choice, should have limits or at least qualifications regarding whom they will serve and when their service has become such that it no longer reflects their needs.
What makes for rewarding play in the D/s arena is pushing limits, expanding them. Often this can be done simply because the subject has a misconception about something that I can easily clear up. 'Pain' for example: few people really want to enjoy being hurt, but rather the change in how the body interprets sensation when aroused. The slap of a belt across the ass stings, but when aroused, it's….something else.
The same can be said about what, on the surface, could be called bisexual behavior. As a culture, a large amount of negativity is applied to the idea, especially for males, which is what makes it an effective tool when choosing to have a male submissive express submission. As a husband, as a man, little is more submissive that having to directly handle the cock of the male cuckolding you. Many would call any such contact 'gay', but I would not. If you would have a relationship with a male in the same manner you would a woman, ok, yes, you're a bisexual, but if your only inclination to be involved with other males is within the context of cuckolding, then I'd have to say it's much more about expressing your submission than it is a desire for bisexuality.
If, as a Dom, I choose to have the cuckold attend to us in the shower and bathe us, he will obviously have to handle me to properly bathe me. Am I getting off on being touched by another guy? No, I'm getting off on her husband being our slave in front of her as he gently soaps and rinsing the bits that pleasure his wife while he accepts denial.
Even among women, where bisexuality is much more accepted (for good reason!), it can still be an expression of submission to engage in sexual play with another woman when directed to by a dominant lover.
That's my two cents.