A serious problem I face as a cuckold… Please advise ..

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- newyorkcuckold
  July 6, 2013 at 3:14 am
  
  Post count: 4
  #9557
  
  My problem is simple but complicated at the same time ..
  
  I’m married to a very nice woman whom I love and she loves me . We are into D/s relationship and she’s a great domme . She’s also into cuckolding and chastity and she enjoys this lifestyle so much and has lots of fantasies about it .
  
  The only problem is that when she cuckolds me she’s excited in the beginning , but then she loses interest in me and get attached to her lover .
  
  This caused her to leave me twice for 2 different men whom she fell in love with . I had to fight for months to get her back .
  
  Now we are back together and she loves me so much , but she admitted to me that she can’t separate good sex and lust from love . Once she has good sex with a man , she feels in love with him and wants to be with him and feels distant from me .
  
  So , for more than a year now , we avoided the lifestyle and we are in a regular marriage without cuckolding anymore .
  
  We are happy and close to each other now , but at the same time I miss cuckolding , humiliation and denial . I liked so much being a cuckold . I also feel that she’s not satisfied by sex with me , we only have sex cause she likes to please me , but she told me many times that she’s not sexually attracted to me .
  
  Also , since she stopped cuckolding me , she became more submissive to me and not dominant anymore !!
  
  So , how can I solve this problem ? Is it possible that she would cuckold me again while loving me at the same time ? So she would feel sexually fulfilled and me to fulfill my cuckolding needs ?
  
  Also , I have another question : Once she told me : I have a real problem , I don’t feel attracted to you like a woman would be attracted to a man . I don’t feel – in love – with you , that I want to hold you , touch you , and have sex with you . But at the same time , you’re not indifferent to me , I feel for you like if you are my pet , my special one , I care for you and I want you with me all the time , I like to humiliate you , but I never feel I love you like if you are my man .
  Are such feelings normal ? Is it common in cuckold lifestyle ?
  
  Please answer my 2 questions please , and please advise me . I need your advice .
  
  Thank you all and best wishes
- jailbird
  July 6, 2013 at 8:02 pm
  
  Post count: 3
  #10891
  
  Those are two very difficult problems and I really feel for you as you try to work them out.
  
  Perhaps the lack of sexual interest on her part could be medical? Does she take any medication that might be inhibiting her libido? You might also try couples counseling—perhaps there is something in her distant background that is interfering with her interest in sex with you. Are you working out, trying to stay fit so that you can serve as a physically active partner in the sex act? Also, giving her a long backrub, building up gradually to a more sexual point over an hour or so might help revive her interests (think of it as a kind of foreplay), particularly if it becomes a regular part of your sensual time together. Of course, I don’t know you or your situation, so perhaps you’ve tried or considered all of these things already.
  
  As for the cuckold issue, her falling in love and dropping you each time she’s stepped out with another man—it sounds dangerous to me, if you want to keep your relationship alive as a reciprocal loving entity. I do understand the pull of the cuckold fantasy, but maybe it should remain just a fantasy—at least for now, until she can work out her own issues. You could always live out some of the same domination, role reversal and humiliation thrills via enforced chastity. If you don’t already do it on a 24/7 basis, you may find that chastity will reawaken her dominant side over the course of some time, and who knows what else it might reawaken with some luck.
  
  Good luck to you and your wife.
- Luvr
  Keymaster
  July 8, 2013 at 9:02 am
  
  Post count: 288
  #10893
  
  Unfortunately, your relationship isn’t one that will support a healthy hotwife/cuckold marriage. At this point, your wife lacks the bond with you that’s necessary in order for the addition of another male to the marriage to not come between you.
- newyorkcuckold
  July 8, 2013 at 1:09 pm
  
  Post count: 4
  #10895
  
  @Luvr said:
  
  Unfortunately, your relationship isn’t one that will support a healthy hotwife/cuckold marriage. At this point, your wife lacks the bond with you that’s necessary in order for the addition of another male to the marriage to not come between you.
  
  Luvr , Thanks for your reply . Why do you think so ? Would you explain please ?
  
  New York Cuckold
- Luvr
  Keymaster
  July 17, 2013 at 3:15 pm
  
  Post count: 288
  #10907
  
  @newyorkcuckold said:
  
  @Luvr said:
  
  Unfortunately, your relationship isn’t one that will support a healthy hotwife/cuckold marriage. At this point, your wife lacks the bond with you that’s necessary in order for the addition of another male to the marriage to not come between you.
  
  Luvr , Thanks for your reply . Why do you think so ? Would you explain please ?
  
  New York Cuckold
  
  I think “I don’t feel attracted to you like a woman would be attracted to a man . I don’t feel – in love – with you , that I want to hold you , touch you , and have sex with you” sums it up. Cuckolding is something that requires a solid, committed relationship – a loving relationship. You two are roommates now, not a loving a couple. I know this sounds harsh, but I have to believe you’ve already come to that conclusion.
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