Cuckolding the cowards way

Hey there! Made an account here a long time ago but never posted. To share a little bit on the title of my first post.

My gf (soon to be fiancé) of 11 years have been open now for 2 years. It started because i asked her about any fetishes she had, because our bedroom experiences have become stale. She mentioned having an interest in having sex with a close friend of ours.

After going through many different stages of emotions, I decided it would be ok. And they have now been fooling around for a few years. He is engaged as well, and lives close by.

I had one girl I saw for a very little while, but that was about it. I found myself much more interested in my girlfriends experiences with our friend.

We have had lots of talks about how I feel, and have arrived at a place where I feel like I am concerned about the whole thing being unhealthy in the long run, however, nothing turns me on more. This site does make me feel much better knowing that I’m not alone.

My latest self tactic is to not internalize the humiliation I might feel as personal, and to just let the fun feelings everyone has flourish. I think my gf is unaware of the term cuckold, but knows that I enjoy what her and her guy do together. I have been at this impass for awhile and feel way to embarrassed to tell her how and why I actually enjoy our arrangement. We are both 29 btw.

Another fear was that while on vacation, we had a pregnancy scare that turned out to be a non issue. It was sort of an experience that made us a little closer since I told her “I agreed to the arrangement we have, This is not the most ideal situation , but I’m not bailing on you. This is both of our responsibility”

She is on the pill, and has been since college. So those scared should not happen. But yeah. For any who read, that’s my story, and thanks for reading. I look forward to reading other people’s stories here and learning from other real couples and individuals more experienced.