Perhaps this couple wants more than their Bull?

We,My wife and I started off by inviting her Bull over for dinner and drinks,They would slip off to the bedroom afterwards to indulge in dessert.He too is single so is very flexible,My wife go’s to his at least twice a week and he comes to ours weekly.We have a system were if the wife wants to spend the night with her Bull she will put my pillows on the spare room bed,That’s a signal to me that she is wanting one on one time with her Bull.We are at the stage were my wife go’s to her Bulls for Dinner also and stays the night at his.The journey has been fantastic and we can’t see anything changing anytime soon.
Dating in public isn’t out of the question but being in a small town we would like to keep our little secret ours,So to still achieve that they just go on dates in another town were we are not known.Were there is a will there is a way..Enjoy keep the communication between you all open and have fun.

Does the bull have other girl friends and is only using your wife for a booty call or extra spice in his life?
I suggest you ask him outright if he wants to escalate or if not, why not. And if he is not going to escalate have your wife find a second / other lover.

Sometimes like Say O mentioned above,The Bull may not want to commit in that way and is just happy being the Booty Call..You really have to talk to him about this.if he isn’t cutting it for you both cut him loose and find another but make your intentions very clear from the start as to what you want from a Bull.

If he has a girlfriend then why would he dump her for j? Can you make a list of reasons, especially if he and she are younger and have more in common than you? Do you speak Millennial?

If he has a girlfriend as well as other booty calls then you will always be in limbo on the GF front and standing in line for sex. You need to consider what his motivation is and it seems the thrill of her being married is not enough to make him want her as a GF. Being a Dom and in control of a couple is a turn on but only one dimension of sex. He is using you to build his ego. Why did j stop seeing him the first time around?

If you want a bull that is a boyfriend then you need to find one that has common interests and is a personality match. Basically, fuck a friend, not just a dick.

BTW, if he is fucking other women then you have to consider if they are fucking others as well… Is everyone dedicated to him like j? The STD mantra is “you are fucking everyone your partner(s) fucks”.

Kink is a great bond but not necessarily binding both ways the same way. If you are enjoying it then by all means continue. There is great satisfaction accepting your role, function and limitations. And if you attend kinky events such as classes or parties you might meet a new Dom that is more interested in focusing on j.

First, let me say that I can certainly understand the frustration and disappointment that can come with mis-matched interests / long term goals in relationships. It’s not a factor of one side is wrong and the other is right- it’s simply that everyone is walking their own path through life. I’ve been there – don’t really have anything that makes it “easier”, though hopefully knowing you aren’t alone brings some value?

The one thought I had while reading the OP was that in some ways it paralleled an experience I had many years ago. I enjoyed a very close long term relationship with a couple – social, romantic, and sexual. We all considered her my girlfriend and his wife concurrently. It wasn’t a “goal” when we first started, but something that naturally developed over time.

From that experience, I’d offer the thought that if this wonderful type of situation is what you two really desire, maybe a change of thought process would help find the right fit. Instead of thinking “cuckold with a deeper relationship”, maybe consider it as “poly with cuckold aspects”. I know I identify myself as much more of the latter than the former, based on my experience with that couple.

I know it was an amazing experience with them, and I really miss it in my life. Someday I hope to find another couple with whom I can build this kind of relationship again.

Oh, exactly. I’ve only had the experience with that one couple, and while I believe it’s possible for me to build a similar connection with another couple, as you said – you never know until you try. 🙂 I do know that over the years I’ve had a number of girlfriends in more “traditional” relationships, and while my relationship with each one was distinct and unique, I can certainly say that I’ve loved them each very deeply. I suspect that same concept applies in this kind of thing too.

My experience was somewhere between a V and a triad. I really had a close connection with both of them, though certainly was much closer with the wife. I enjoyed many evenings snuggled up with her on the couch watching a movie while hubby sat in his favorite chair. I also watched more than a few football games with hubby down in his man-cave. I really felt “at home” any time I was there with them.

I hope you guys are able to find the right path from here to where you want to be! 🙂

Is there any chance he might be unaware of your intentions and your wife’s feelings towards him? With my current couple, the gf actually sat me down and said that they saw me more than just a booty call and that’s how things REALLY took off.