- This topic is empty.
-
Posts
-
-
kinkypixie
Hi all,
as a couple, my wife and I are new to all of this. I'm quite dominant myself and she is very submissive. We're both really excited about the idea of a cuckold relationship, but we're taking things really slow at the moment (especially as we've just had a baby together, so extra-marital activities are certainly going to be put on hold for a bit!).
My question to those experienced in these matters is this:
As my wife is very submissive, how would her receiving extra sex from another man (or woman!) change the dynamic of our relationship? As I said, I'm quite dominant myself and not really into all of the 'sissy' name-calling so I'd like to know how other submissive wives have changed with the introduction of a lover into the equation.
Regards!
K
-
Luvr
Welcome K,
I cannot answer your question without asking you one first: what do you truly wish your role to be? As the dominant partner in the couple now, you have the ability to share her as a dominant vs sharing her as a cuckold. The difference is perspective/role. As her dominant, you would be making the choices of who has access to her body, how they can enjoy her, what intimate pleasures she will provide them. As a cuckold, that's largely out of your hands as you are sharing her from a more submissive perspective.
Having said that, you may still desire to share her from a submissive perspective, that is, not being the one to make all the decisions about who is inside your wife and when. Even for someone who currently fills the dominant role, this can be very attractive. Being the dominant doesn't always mean that's who you want to be or who you want to be sexually.
There are a number of ways to approach this and I'd be glad to discuss them with you, but I'd like some feedback from you on where you see this going for yourself. How your wife is going to respond to another man inside her will greatly depend on what your role in this is.
I have been with a couple myself where the husband was the dominant partner, but wasn't experienced as a Dom and involved me as their 'trainer' assuming that's the role he wanted in their lifestyle. When the three of us were together, she belonged to me, no questions asked. I didn't treat him as a cuckold, but more as a student who deferred to an instructor. He still followed my instructions, he still was denied being inside his wife for at least two days before we would be together and he deferred to me in how I chose to enjoy/train her. I would call this a more passive role than submissive, though if you step back and consider the context, it's still quite submissive given our societal norms, but but not to the extent of actively humbling him and overtly exercising his submission.
Perhaps this is something along the lines of what you need.
-
kinkypixie
Hi there, thanks for the swift reply!
In short, I'm not sure what future role I'll have – that's one of the reasons we're taking things really slowly and sounding everything out first.
I've never been into the humiliation aspect of it, so I sometimes feel a little out of place being a dominant husband with a submissive wife when so many in the cuckold lifestyle seem to have the opposite!
As a dominant husband, I've pretty much pushed most of my wife's limits and I'd now like to sit back and watch someone else see what limits they could push her to.
It's sort of an extension of the control thing, I guess. I've got her to give herself to me completely and now I'd like her to submit herself to someone else as part of that, rather than instead of it. I'd like to see her allow herself to be used by another man because it pleases me for her to do it (although in our conversations about this, she's made it clear that it's something she'd really enjoy doing too!)
As a dominant I have enjoyed changing my wife to suit my needs, but now things have levelled off with her being my perfect submissive. The mischievous instinct in me wants to mix things up a little, push her out of her comfort zone and watch her go through all of those changes again as she obediently tries to make herself right for someone else, along with all of the crazy complications of trying to be 'right' for different people.
I hope you can see where I'm coming from as it's not as clear cut as the usual 'I'm not good enough for my wife so I want her to have someone better' scenario that I keep reading about.
Anyway, if there are any other dominant husbands out there (or submissive wives) who've had a similar experience please feel free to reply or message with ideas or to tell me how it worked out for you.
Thanks once again, Luvr, for that swift reply!
K
-
Luvr
You answered my questions perfectly.
I'd say that sharing her is really just an extension of the lifestyle you already have. Teaching her/requiring her to pleasure others simply gives her another avenue to make you proud of her.
I think you would enjoy sharing her with other Doms as well who may bring new perspectives to the table in terms of her training and sharing.
Good luck to you both.. hope to hear (and see) more from you in the future.
-
kinkypixie
Luvr- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.