true cuckold pregnancy experience , not a fantasy pls

hi all , i am an arab muslim cuckold , we have been in the lifestyle for about 5 years , my wife has slept with over than 8 men in the last 6 years but she always play alone ,she doesn’t like to use condoms and always go bareback, and she had a problem with getting pregnant(not me) so she was kind of save of getting pregnant , until the past year she got pregnant , and wer are not sure who is the father me , or her ex bf, the problem is , sometimes it turn’s me on so much , and sometimes i feel alot of guilt, i have always dreamed her to get pregnant from another man , but i fell guilty and i am afraid from this feeling , i wanna enjoy it and accept that i am cuckold without feeling guilty , please i want help , i want to be 100% cuckold and kill guilty and Jealous feeling , i wanna live my alll fantasy and be happy always to rais another man’s baby , it would help me alot if hear there is someone like me who raising another man’s baby , but please only the true story without fantasy