Consider marriage a flower garden where each blossom represents the myriad things that a couple shares in their marital life:
- children
- family
- friends
- hobbies
- finances
- vacations
- intimacy
These are all the things that bind a couple – give them common purpose and identity and already we have quite a few blossoms in the garden, but there’s one patch where nothing grows. You both know that something should be growing there, but you can easily see it’s not there.
This spot is often intimacy.
Couples may be emotionally intimate, yet physically unfulfilled for one reason or more and that flower will simply not grow. The couple tends to their other flowers and tries to pretend that one little bare patch doesn’t matter, but you always know it does. Many couples believe their only option is to enjoy their garden for what it already contains and try to be content.
When a husband and wife work together to overcome this bare patch of soil, by including another male to provide new seed, so to speak, the seed planted becomes a blossom both spouses tend together, a blossom that joins the other elements which bind them as a couple.
Not all flowers are perennials and as such, may require planting a new seed together every once in a while, but the true value of the flower isn’t the blossom itself, but tending to it together and having a complete garden.
Hello Luvr, I am impressed with the site and how you have delt with the subject. I am pleasently suprised . I am new to this and am looking for the best way to introduce my wife to this. We are in our 40s, an attractive couple, educated and open minded. We have not experimented outside our marriage to this point. My wife is not aware of my ging on this site but after I am familiar with the site I wil include her. We do not keep secrets and I am sure she will be as curious as I am. Any help that can be given will b appreciated.
This is indeed a beautiful analogy. For my wife and I, things started with me having the fantasy of my wife being driven to bliss with other men. I don’t think I understood at the time why I had these fantasies, but the more we had difficulties in the bedroom between us, the more the fantasy started to grow. It took a lot time for us to act on them, but once a man came into her life that she found irresistible she approached me with the prospect of having found someone and wanting to test the waters with him, so to speak. So, with my permission, she did and he quickly became her boyfriend. Instantly her visits to his bed became well more often than either of us initially thought she would. Her reports from her long nights with him have brought out into the open that he is well suited to be her sexual mate and that he provides her with experiences that not only am I unable to provide, but she has admitted, she’s never really been interested in having me provide. “I’ve just never felt that instinct towards you”, she has since told me. It was a hard pill to swallow and has contributed to much cuckold anxiety on my part, but deep down I’ve always known it to be true, and what’s more is that the way things are now feel perfectly natural for both of us. After reading this website and talking with my wife about her newly found needs and her boyfriend’s fulfillment of them, I try to redouble my efforts to be loving and supportive. Nonetheless, it’s not always easy and despite my cock being as hard as a rock at the thought of them pleasing each other, sometimes it feels like my world is crashing down. There’s no way we could ever go back though, and no way would I ever want to.
A beautiful analogy Luvr, I compliment you. From our own experience, it was me (the husband) that spotted a bare patch on the physical intimacy we had, and after discussing it for several seasons (way too long I know), she agreed we could plant some new seed there. We discovered that the new seed brought much colour and vibrance to our marital garden, yet the bloom lasted just a month or so. As a consequence, that bare patch has been been seeded many times over the last 8 years or so. It has always given me much pleasure to help in the selection of the new seed, and to observe it being planted deep in the furrow.