Letting Him Watch
Too many wives have the attitude that their intercourse with a boyfriend or lover is is a personal and private pleasure to which the husband has no right to witness. Often these wives cite how ‘uncomfortable’ they are being watched and/or the boyfriend’s reluctance to have the husband watch is allowed to come between husband and hotwife.
Bullshit. On all of it.
What differentiates cuckolding from swinging is the singular focus on the wife as the center of the marriage and the center of marital sexuality. The husband has already given up much to even entertain the practice of his wife’s extramarital sex. Enjoying the situation doesn’t mean it’s been any less difficult for him.
Compromise
I say it all the time: cuckolding is still a marriage and therefore still requires compromise. For wives who aren’t 100% comfortable being watched by their husband: get over it. He’ll never be 100% comfortable with you sharing your most intimate pleasures with someone else, but he’s comfortable enough to set the discomfort aside so you can both enjoy this experience – now its your turn. It doesn’t have to happen overnight and doesn’t have to happen all the time, but your cuckold absolutely deserves to sometimes witness your coupling whether you and your boyfriend like it or not.
Perspective
Rather than believe you’re offering your husband something he may not deserve or something you’re not sure you want to offer, consider the idea of using it to lovingly tease your cuckold further. If your lover has been asking for something you’ve not done with your husband, then I’d say the time to give in to him on that is with your husband watching.
Point Of View
Your lover doesn’t have to know your husband is watching, either; in the case of a reluctant boyfriend, you do have options. You can give him time to adjust or move the fuck on or you can arrange to have your husband watch you two covertly. A third choice for those wives dating someone they really enjoy inside them who isn’t likely to let the husband watch is to start dating an additional lover who will.
Being a witness to his wife’s coupling, periodically, is a right, not a privilege.
There’s many good reasons for the husband to be present, or very close by. Personally, I get a huge thrill out of seeing my wife being fucked by another guy, and from her perspective, she appreciates that I’m there for her and provide a degree of security. The men we meet up with are sexually charged strangers – that can often lead to a very physical experience for her, but there are of course dangers for a woman on her own in such a situation.
i find it a real shame if the husband is left out of things, i dont think its being fully Cuckold if he is he should be there.
Brian
I feel that there should be compromise in such situations. If a wife has a permanent lover then she may want to occasionally be alone with him so she can demonstrate her emotional commitment and tell him how she feels about him without giving her husband cause to worry or feel ‘left out’. She may also include her husband and allow him to watch her being taken by her lover and subtly include him in the act of love by meeting his eyes and smiling at him as her lover penetrates her, couples with her and ejaculates into her. My wife and I have done this often and I always feel closer to her when I witness her pleasure, but then she has a permanent lover who is O.K. with my presence by the bed.
The new boyfriend who wants to be with her alone is a problem. My advice would be to make sure that the husband can sit comfortably and watch discreetly; keyholes or cameras or whatever works would be my suggestion (not the bl**dy wardrobe). The wife should then ensure that she makes a few discrete connections with her husband as her lover does his thing.
A cuckold will accept most things as long as he does not feel that he is excluded and he is losing the wife he loves.
Cuhlman – I’m with you on this. My wife being taken by another man in front of me is good, and if there are times when the two of them are alone then I can accept that also. But the guy who wants her just for himself presents a problem – afterall, what are his motives in this?
One of the few times I found myself ‘not there’ was when a Bull couldn’t get an erection in the hotel room and blamed my presence. We could have left there and then, but I choose to leave them to it and waited in the corridor outside. I did check on them after 15 minutes as I heard her gentle cries through the door and he was giving her a good seeing to, so I shut the door and waited for him to finish. Overall, disappointing that he wasn’t able to provide the Bull service to a married couple as he’d advertised, but it created a heightened experience for her as this was the first time I’d left her alone with a hung black bull.
Watching my Wife
I learned about being a cuckold when my wife cheated on me. I found out about it. I was upset/excited. When I confronted her she was sorry. But, as time progressed I would bring it up again. I could not stop thinking about her with the other man. But, she noticed my erections. And she relized that I longed for details. Jill and I came to an understanding. We agreed that she could be with others; although, I would not do likewise.
I watch my wife with others as often as possible. It allows me to see her pleasure. Jill has had a few lovers. And I just love seeing how another guy pleases my wife. I try to learn from watching. My penis is small. It is not a cock for sure. I imposed it on my wife. And she needed larger. By watching I get to see that this is very real. I see that my wife really does require a well endowed man. By watching my jealousy is more pronounced. And I can see that I actually should feel jealous. And by watching my wife can see that I am reactive to her being with another man. She can see my erection. When I masturbate she can see me doing it. She has real knowledge that I am positive about her getting this extra pleasure.
And watching is not limited to her having sex. I watch her getting ready for her well endowed lovers. Seeing her do her hair and put her make-up on (for her lover) is absolutly thrilling. I also assist her. But, thru the process, the visual, does not stop. “Watching” balances out my cuckold anxiety.
I think that her lovers feel more secure knowing that I really know and want it to happen. And by my being there, they see my on the spot, approval/my erection.
My penis reacts differently to various things. When I see him undressing her my erections gets thicker. And their senuous kissing also increases my erection. And I stiffen to even slight humiliation. But watching is key.
I am impressed how well Luvr understands the cuckold’s mind-set.
And he brings up that a cuckold need not watch all the time.
This is especially difficult for me…..but, he’s right.
I agree.. I have not been allowed to watch my wife with other men.. and its become a bit of a wedge issue for me…I doubt the anger is a good thing for our relationship
My wife wanted me to watch her with her former bf and I didn’t agree to do it because I thought it would be too intense for me and now I regret it. It was her fantasy to have the three of us together, for her to fuck her bf – taller, bigger in every way – in front of me, and for me to watch. But I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I hadn’t met the guy yet, now I think maybe it would have worked but it’s too late. So she in between guys now. It’s become a fantasy for me despite the discomfort. If only I can find a way to accept it and enjoy!
It comes down to mutually agreed conditions in each case. However, what makes modern cuckolding different from cheating is that there is knowledge, consent, and trust. There is also some component of involvement for the cuckold. If this is still within the context of the marriage, then the husband should not be left out.
On the other hand, the whole idea is the wife’s liberation and satisfaction. Most people have a typically difficult time relaxing and climaxing while someone is gawking at their every move. Just ask folks in the adult film industry; it looks like easy fun until you are in the same room as clothed people and cameras.
The first time with a new lover is a difficult call. For safety, many or most might demand the husband be present. You don’t know if the guy will break character and become abusive and dangerous when finally alone and naked with the wife. You don’t know if he will refuse to use a condom despite agreeing to that demand. The husband also might want to be there to moderate things if the wife freely decides she doesn’t want to do something or even anything, as is her right. However, the first time with a new lover is an important moment of intimacy shared that can be ruined by disruption of loss of focus. The cuckold presence can actually amplify a future “alone” session as it will have that novelty to it.
How often and what level of engagement is a case by case call and should just develop naturally, rather than follow some rules. Perhaps re-evaluate it periodically to make sure nobody is on a different page, but let it go where it leads. Some might go for prep and clean-u. Others are comfortable with MFM or sloppy seconds. Still others want the cuckold present for humiliation because that is their collective kink. Most probably are happy with a mix of presence sometimes, knowledge all of the time, and teasing when not present. That teasing could be a selfie sent before, during, and/or after sex. It could be an open line on the phone listening in or a cam showing the action in real time. It could be photos or videos. It could also be as simple as the cuckold witnessing an extended deep kiss of appreciation given to the bull when he/she is leaving or upon her return home. Many are quite happy just seeing to tasting the resultant creampie or sleeping in their mixed puddle of orgasmic fluids in their marital bed.
I didnot get to watch with her previous lovers, since it was always either outside or when I was not in the house. But with the present lover, who is a young Bull , it is always in our house. Foreplay in thrmain lobby and love making in our bed room and am asked to be there. It is a great feeling to see her having her oleasure in front of me. I regret that i missed out earlier
I think it is the Husbands right to watch if he wants to , after all if it wasn’t for him and him going along with it or even suggesting it in the first place she wouldn’t have an outside guy .