Cuckolding is traditionally perceived as a lifestyle predicated on the husband’s sexual inadequacy, but for some couples, this is the goal rather than the starting line.
For many couples, the appeal of cuckolding isn’t to replace something missing, it’s to create a new dynamic. At the core of this experience is the empowerment of the the wife through becoming a hotwife – a sexually liberated married (or otherwise committed) woman. This empowerment is often so attractive to her because she has traditionally not been the more dominant partner in the relationship and it’s the empowerment which drives her interest in cuckolding her husband more than the opportunity to invite another male inside her.
Take my second couple for example: both attractive people in their 30s, she was a tall and slender sandy blonde with breasts perfectly proportional to her frame. He was my height, build and erect he was perhaps even a bit longer than me. When I first met his wife online she told me he couldn’t fuck her longer than ten minutes. What she didn’t tell me was that before she began fucking other men in front of him, he could fuck her as long as he wanted to.
So what happened? Empowerment expressed as a power exchange.
Sharing her was at first a fantasy neither one of them expected to become a reality, but once he admitted to her how much he enjoyed it when men tried to seduce her, the pillow talk and fantasies gave her a clear path to being empowered. She recognized the intensity of this fantasy for him and how it could be used to bargain his behavior and used that to negate his tendency to only take the pillow talk to a certain point of arousal before he would assert control so he could fuck her. Tying him to the sort of reclining lounge chair one finds by the pool became the only way she could explore these ideas with him without him just taking her when he wanted to. Being free to explore ideas and tease her husband, she quickly realized how certain topics, certain ideas rapidly pushed him toward the cliff of orgasm. She would often mount him, cowgirl, while he was bound to the lounge chair, and use his cock like a dildo, but even when she controlled the pace, only a few of the right words could send him over the edge. She then began hand training him – using her hand to tease him instead of riding him, hoping he’d last longer that way – somehow that got him off even faster. Now I understand why, but at the time that mad no sense to me. She became much more fascinated by her ability to have such sexual control over her otherwise dominant husband and his impressive cock than by the option to allow someone else to seduce her (or think he had).
Catch 22
It didn’t take her long to realize that she always had to give in, in the end, to get fucked, but it was a very short coupling – too short. To work around that they tried lovemaking without the teasing and pillow talk, but found that lacking. The only way to enjoy her teased male and enjoy being fucked by one was to invite another male into their marriage. Doing that meant she could fully explore stripping her husband of his sexual prowess.
Learning to uncouple the idea of being inside his wife simply because he’s erect and desires her is much more challenging for both when he’s above average, but doing so becomes twice as rewarding.
Is the phrase “rob him of his sexual prowess” still reverberating inside your mind? I know it sounds cruel to some, but done within the context of a loving, hotwife/cuckold relationship, it’s simply another way to express a submissive role on behalf of the husband and way for his hotwife to feel empowered. This energy even transfers to the boyfriend if/when he becomes aware that his play with the wife has enabled her to further the necessity of his role in their marriage.
I was told I was the third guy to play with her (them). We always played together and he was always bound to the chair, on a towel, while watching us. I usually started with her in missionary, but she always wanted to ride me so she could look at her cuckold and taunt him. He would be leaking mostly constantly and she would sometimes slip off my cock and go over to him and tease him physically in her hands or even mount him briefly before returning to me. I believe it was those moments forever captured in his mind that robbed him of his stamina. Even when alone with her and free of any teasing by her, those memories and images couldn’t be escaped. To paraphrase his wife, “The only thing sexier than a nice, big cock is seeing my husband’s twitch helplessly for me.”
They told me he only got her hand or his own while she was ‘seeing someone’, but I don’t really know if that was true or something they told me to make me feel special. She did demonstrate how easily she could make him spurt – rather like the video below, though he was already quite erect when she started.
This is obviously not an actual couple (porn couple), but the situation is valid and mirrors what I experienced with my second couple. I was little more than a living dildo for her and we really never had much of a gf/bf kind of thing. Even though it was hot to fuck her like that while it lasted, I’d have to say I’ve gained more from it in hindsight than I did in the moment.
I’ve talked to a number of couples who have discovered this dynamic and actively pursued it, including one just recently. Though it’s intense to consider the idea that such a shift in his sexual stamina is permanent, it’s most likely not, but while his wife feels empowered to rob him of it, that’s very likely to happen!
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My wife has two huge sexual fantasies: one involves being helpless and being made to come, and the other is that she is incredibly powerful sexually and men just can’t control themselves from coming when she fucks them. The second fantasy is what Luvr appears to be talking about here.
The interesting thing about a cuckolding lifestyle is that it gives a woman an opportunity to have both. With her boy friend she is essentially helpless: he has no commitment to her and she has no control over him, she can’t keep him from walking away except by giving him everything he wants and more. With her husband, on the other hand, she is totally in control. He can’t keep his hands off her and wants her every minute, but she can deny him or restrict his access to her pussy — preserving it for her boy friend who makes her come and come when he fills her with his semen. And when she holds her husband in her arms, he will come uncontrollably in seconds at her magic touch!
“For many couples, the appeal of cuckolding isn’t to replace something missing, it’s to create a new dynamic. At the core of this experience is the empowerment of the the wife through becoming a hotwife – a sexually liberated married (or otherwise committed) woman. This empowerment is often so attractive to her;”
This statement is so very true. Certainly in our case and it is likewise with another couple whom we know.
The words “empowerment” and “liberated” are the key. My wife has certainly enjoyed discovering what those words can mean. Gave explanation, thank you.
This article directly applies to us, my fiancée Ella and me. Prior to introducing the idea of her controlling my orgasms and becoming a hotwife, my stamina was incredible. I could have sex almost indefinitely, and our sexual sessions would end not with my climax (which never occurred), but with her finally becoming too sore to continue.
After we discussed and incorporated my chastity along with her now peaked interest in becoming a hotwife, my prior “stud” status came to an abrupt end. My being denied the ability to masturbate, and overwhelmed with the idea of another man fully seated inside my young fiancée were the physical and mental triggers that finally brought about my first orgasm ever from intercourse.
Obviously, this experience brought the two of us much closer, as it would and does with any couple, but it came with a tradeoff. I was stripped of my stamina, and now last only 5-10 minutes, depending upon how long she has denied me.
Her empowerment is very real, and my newfound inadequacy has given her not only immediate power in the bedroom, but also extended beyond to give her greater overall confidence in everyday life. Her empowerment by dethroning me of my “stud” status and making me far more average has brought us closer as a couple and been instrumental in her realizing and assuming this new dynamic…her role and desire to be a hotwife.