Today is THE Day!
I have finally made the commitment today to be a full-fledged cuck for my wife. I have decided to get rid of all jealousy and insecurities lingering in my mind to allow my wife full access to who she is, as a beautiful, deserving, loving, sensuous woman.
I began this blog to keep a record of my journey on this road to cuckoldry, by sharing my experiences of how cuckoldry changed my life, by redefining who I am today and who I am about to become.
What took so long? For the last seven years I let jealous feelings get in the way. On one hand, I enjoyed and reveled in her return after her hot and heavy sex sessions with her lovers, cleaning up her precious love box with soft, gentle tongue lashings, but on the other hand I would complain to her about her behavior and make her feel guilty and bad about what she had done. I was not able to let her ‘DO HER THING’ without bitching and moaning about it because I had always felt that SHE had the better deal (That DEAL being…..Her ability to Fuck anyone she wanted to….yet I could not) It is NOT that I wanted to be with other women (because I DID NOT) it was just the jealousy that I did not have an opportunity to even do it.
Well, I told her this morning that after observing her behavior over the last couple of days job hunting, I became aware of her positive attitude, self-confidence, professional attitude and free spirit. It was enlightening to me because I had never seen this side of her, all the years that we have been together (24 years). This ‘new woman’ was exciting, refreshing, smart and sexy, and there was no way that I was going to hold her back from everything she could become. Therefore the change of heart on my part, to become her full-time cuck to serve her every need.
I intended to begin this blog to keep a diary of what has transpired over the last seven year, to document how we got to where we are presently, but TODAY is sooooo significant that I am placing THIS BLOG (Jumping Ahead…….Fast Forward 7/12/11) to let the world know that TODAY WAS MY DAY OF COMMITMENT to my wife. I will try to continue my blog in chronological order of how the events of each year unfolded, but TODAY was a VERY important day for me.
Excellent!
Looking forward to seeing how this develops!
I am almost at that stage in fact very close. My wife has been cuckolding me for a while about five years. I have gone through every emotion possible ,from disgust,anger,jealousy,fear,lonliness sadness and so on.At one point for about two years I thought she had stopped seeing her lover and, in fact for a whie she had. In that period she was difficult to live with and over time I come to realise that my wifes needs could not go unfullfilled When she did eventually start seeing him again I noticed her mood change for the better. I quizzed her a bit and found out I was right and again for a shorter period of about a month I experienced all the emotions above. However this time I discussed the issue more openly to find her experience was not affecting her relationship with me in the adverse she was quite clear that she did not want to leave me ever but she needed the attention of other men. This man was quite safe as she had known him for a while. I had overlooked how unsafe a woman may feel with absolute strangers.The penny is now dropping in that I am looking at how this situation is beneficial and rather than get angry with a man who I previously thought was free riding my wife, literally, I started to look at this in another way.My wife’s needs are I think genuine, and like a lot of people may have developed when young and now deep seated. If not fulflled she will be very unhappy and I have to live with that.I do not have similar needs as I have a beautiful sexy wife who does not deny me sex and I can relieve with pornography if I have to. However if i had a deep rooted sexual need to see other women I can appreciate this would be very unsettling in a marriage continuously sneaking and cheating. How good would it be if I were like that and my wife understood therefore I could be a respectable dad and husband whilst satisfying my needs.Some would say she should work on her needs and try to reform to become a faithful happy wife. Possibly this may be so but that route would take a lot of committment and time,and, the rest of her personality has been built around what she is. Therefore perhaps the man in her life is actually doing a service. I have considered how much this would cost financially if I had to sort the issue that way. A lot.Therefore I have come to accept that this is my wifes needs, I love her, the man in her life helps her with a great risk to himself as he is married and a the moment he does not get a lot in return.Therefore rather than him stealing something which is mine he is actually helping me. That is where I am today I will keep you posted.