Offering something valued to another is a cornerstone of cuckolding. A husband making room in the marriage for another male to enjoy sex with his wife is an obvious example, but even in the most mild forms of sharing provides clear examples of giving. Many husbands begin their journey toward cuckolding without even realizing it when they first put their wife upon that pedestal by realizing she’s too amazing for only himself to appreciate. The first expression of this comes when the husband offers others more intimate, more erotic views of his wife by supporting and encouraging her to dress sexier and to highlight her most appealing physical attributes.
At the same time, a wife gives of herself by participating and transcending the sometimes critical judgements of society for embracing being feminine and sexual.
When this basic form of sharing behavior is expressed with and for a boyfriend, all three are participating in a symbiotic cycle that reinforces the choices made to offer something of value to another. When we then layer other ‘gifts’ atop this foundation: access to intercourse, submission, denial, the weight of the giving becomes much heavier and meaningful for everyone.
As with most aspects of this experience, couples should discuss the gift options as any other aspect of the lifestyle is discussed.
Checking his response to gift suggestions
Gifting and Cuckolding
This guide is mostly aimed at those couples who are currently committed to a specific bull for the wife: her boyfriend. Gift giving within the context of cuckolding makes far more sense in this situation. Couples who are more a hotwife marriage than a cuckold marriage might still gift their bull(s) but the same options and depth of meaning cannot be achieved.
Gifts can be grouped several ways and some gifts blur the lines between categories depending on how they are given and enjoyed. Often a gift given can be enjoyed by everyone but for different reasons – this is in line with the power of cuckolding as a dynamic catalyst in a relationship.
A) Gift Items: the traditional practice of giving a physical item can often be used as an invitation to other gifts (B and C).
- framed, and notably sexy picture of her for his home or office
- implements for discipline: paddles, crops, clamps, cuffs, collar, leash, chastity device
- new or first time chastity device; the wife providing the device is two gifts at once (see B5)
- new outfits for her to wear for him publicly and/or privately (see A1)
- a physical calendar already marked with overnights at this place or periods of exclusivity
B) Milestone Achievement: It’s a good time to elevate the experience by taking some aspect to the next level.
- staying overnight at his place: at yours would be his gift to you two as a couple (see A5)
- taking a weekend trip: often a way to recognize his role and value (see A5)
- coupling bare: another way to recognize his status
- being shared: perhaps he’s mentioned it but there’s not been commitment
- denial play: whether accompanied by a chastity device or not (see A2)
C) Special Event: a special outing for attendance to an event which can be common around the holidays
- inviting the boyfriend to family dinner at home (see 5a)
- attending a work party as his +1 (see 5a)
- exclusivity for a period of time whether accompanied by chastity or not (see A5)
- being spanked: the gift of a riding crop or paddle creates the offering (see A2)
Choosing something that supports a bit of cosplay encourages role playing and exploration as well as displaying her in an amazing manner. To cap off the gift, take the time as a couple to photograph her in this outfit in a number of poses and pick one to print and frame as a gift for display at his home or workplace.
one outfit can inspire many orgasms
Toys N Tools
Purchased gifts need not be expensive – just a bit of rope can have many creative uses. If there is budget to be had, then additional options are always available.
This combination of chastity cage and harness-mounted dildo helps keep a cuckold mindful of his role and the loss of control of his genitals while also ensuring his cuckoldress gets the exercise she needs between dates. Chastity play also encourages other forms of intimacy for cuckolds like edging and ruined orgasms.
A sleeved option to the chastity/harness combination that achieves the same outcome: a focus on the wife’s pleasure.
Chastity is not required for edging play but it does help ensure a fuller load is expressed when the wife provides release either as a full or ruined orgasm. In this case, this orgasm was entirely ruined and the cuckold will like either remain erect or become erect again quite easily. Witnessing this is a gift a boyfriend might find inspirational on the path to becoming a Dom for his couple.
the simplest items provide the most emotionally complex gifts
Choosing a holiday as a time to commit to establishing a new milestone is practical and expresses the positive intent needed for a gift. Couples just starting out often have a lot of room for milestones, but some important ones to work on are:
Witness to Coupling
It’s just as selfish to not allow the cuckold to witness his wife’s coupling as it is for him to expect to always be present for it. Wives and boyfriends are commonly put off by the idea of being watched, but a) it’s a cuckold’s right to be involved this way at least some of the time and b) it’s an incredibly powerful empowerment for both the wife and the boyfriend to be coupled together in front of her husband. If nothing else, this is one of the best ways for a hotwife and her boyfriend to reward their cuckold for his support.
it doesn’t have to be this perspective but a cuckold does need to see this
It’s very common and suitable for wives who have taken on the role of being a girlfriend for their boyfriend to be their +1 to events and parties, but it’s a big step the first time or two. The cuckold and the couple still benefit from the intimacy of his involvement in her preparation for the date/event and a new dress/outfit can also be part of the event.
For couples who have dated exclusively outside of the home, making a boyfriend welcome at home is not only appropriate, but creates an extended opportunity for foreplay the entire time leading up to coupling. For couples needing to work toward better integration for the boyfriend, this is a necessary step toward that goal anyway.
Without experiencing at least a short-term commitment to exclusivity of intercourse between the wife and the boyfriend, couples never learn to expand their expressions of intimacy. While cutting off a cuckold from all sex is not the case for every couple, I believe that making the boyfriend the sexual priority is a must. One way to experience the power of denial is to gift the boyfriend 90 days of exclusivity.
Regardless of what you celebrate each winter season, celebrate the commitment and investment made in your relationship and gift appropriately.