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    • #26723

        Recently the wife mentioned to me about bringing another guy into our relationship. I’ve kinda been over the past months mentioning I’m interested and she’s been showing interest too. What’s some good steps to take?

      • #26734

          I’m surprised no one said anything for over 2 days.
          That is a very open question …. so:
          1 – I would say start by reading the posts here and other hotwife sites. Don’t just read the fun wanker stories but look at the ones that explain what made it work and be sure to read the ones where things failed. You don’t want to set yourself on a path to divorce.
          2 – Talk / communicate. How does she imagine it and how do you imagine it? Is there a lot of overlap? Are you both willing to bend to make the other happy? Are you willing to stop if the other is unhappy? What if she finds she is falling in love with one bull?
          3 – Get tested for STDs, including test that are specific for and separate Herpes 1 and Herpes 2. A lot of unsuspecting people have an STD and Herpes 1 (cold sores) is very common, and Herepes 2 (Genital Herpes) is also pretty common. Many people are + for one or the other but don’t have symptoms and the tests are flaky so if you test + get a retest a few months later when feeling healthy. You want to know if you have any STDs a) get a cure if it is curable b) so you can share with potential partners c) so you can get over the shock and mourning if you are HSV1 or HSV 2 positive. The world does not end but people react very emotionally and need time to process and research if they are positive. It also tells you who you may be willing or NOT willing to play with. I.e. if you have HSV 1 but not HSV 2 then you may want to avoid playing with someone who has HSV 2 or anyone untested….
          4 – When you feel sure you have a game plan to make sure you stay together, consider testing the waters. You can try going to a swingers club or kinky party. That way if you see your wife getting fucked and it blows your mind you can put a hold on play until you figure what you can handle. Not watching is always an option. If you get turned on and she does too, you can take further steps.
          5 – Assuming you want to continue decide if you (both) want her to have a single of few regular bulls or if she wants to sleep around. Personally I recommend having one or very limited number of partners because of all the STDs going around. Having to say to someone show me your latest (and reasonably recent) STD panel / results makes hooking up harder and far from spontaneous but if they think you are worth it then they will share. Don’t just take their word “I’m std free / clean.” Have them show you a report, ideally on line at a reputable testing site or HMO report (my HMO posts my results to my account.)
          6 – sadly Craigslist personals are dead. You can try advertising here, OK Cupid, Collarspace (if you are a bit into kink), fetlife is not really a dating site. Ashley Madison and Adult finder and other sites cost $$. Can anyone recommend good free or reasonably priced classifieds sites?
          – Another option – if you are on other forums and are talking to people you find interesting bring up the subject of sex. It is far better if you have common interests and simply ask someone you like near where you live or even hang out with (not at work though). I think many men would love to be invited but hold back out of respect and social training. If you simply approach a likely candidate and comment about your wife’s assets you can gauge response and lead them into a discussion.
          7 – After every encounter with the bull, talk. At least for the first year or two share the experience and make sure that you are still on the same page.

        • #26805

            You have received some good advice above. Do make sure you carry through. Like what was stated already, communicate! And if there are any ground rules, establish those early on.

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