Home discussion Lifestyle Discussions Getting Started A little advice please, where do I fit in all this?

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    • #39562
      Dave

        Hi,

        I’ve been lurking here a while now and this is my first time posting. I’ve been very drawn to the cuckold scene now for a number of years. But I don’t seem to fit with what at least it seems most of you here (cucks) are like. I’ve done a lot of reading and I’m a little confused. I am not what you’d call a typical cuck at all in the sense that I’m no beta by anyones standard. If anything I’d be a bull on paper. But I have a burning passion for 95% of what I read about on here. The bits that stand out as not for me are impregnating, not ever having sex again with my partner and I’m not even sure I could live with the idea of sharing her emotionally either. However I love denial, chastity, clean up, listening, watching and being supprised with a screen shot of a txt or a short video of something I knew nothing about etc. All the phisical stuff and power play drives me wild.

        So what I wanted to ask is, is it common for people who would not on paper be considered cuck material to gravitate toward this? Perhaps because it is the opposite of how they are in ‘real life’? I can accept people saying its just a kink in that case. But the power play and even the idea of her cheating although destructive and not ideal makes me cry many a ‘cuck tear’. We have spoken about it for ages now and come pretty close. She even had a guy shes known a while (her best friends brother in law) who is a fit, gorgeous and charming african man. Lined up to come around and fuck her while I was to be blindfolded, caged and tied to the bed in the next room without him knowing. However sadly, we found out 2 hours before his arrival. That the mutual friend who indroduced us had died the night before. So we obviously canceled and then when we spoke about it again a while after she got cold feet. She didn’t want to risk hurting him as she thought he might have got genuine feelings for her. I think she might have been worried she would end up having feelings for him and wanting to be with him. I’ve already told her that although it might seem mad to her. I’d be gutted if that happened but also happy for her if she ended up happier. So it’s a pro and a con in that case. But ideally I’d preffer if we had random encounters with carefully selected guys who are bulls as opposed to boyfriends.

        I don’t usually have a problem satisfying her as I’ve always had a personal rule of, make a woman cum before she’s even seen my dick. Plus my dick is average length and quite girthy. I do some times loose erections due to psychological reasons and also have PE on and off. Some times I’m a stallion lol and others a damp squib. So I’d like her to be able to have some consistent cock in her life. I want her to be happy, liberated and in control. But I also love it as well. In life I’m someone who people gravitate to and look up to. I would be considdered an alpha except I’m sick of most people nowadays and hate an entourage. In my life I have to project that type of energy and it gets boring.

        I want to explore the world of cuckolding regardless and would welcome any tips or comments from anyone else who relates to my situation. I’m currently in therapy due to this on her request. Not that it’s had the desired effect as the therapist says it’s quite normal and becoming increasingly common for men to want to watch their partners with other men etc. Plus except for a warning about where it would possibly end if I went through with it, she seemed quite supportive lol. I think she wants to do it, she’s just worried i’ll regret it if she does and I won’t be as happy as I think with the reality. I’ve assured her as long as I get full kandor and transparency I’ll be fine. I’d also like to hear how long it took guys out there to assure your wives to where they would take the plunge. I don’t want to drive her mental and be a pest, but I can’t get it out of my head.

        One more thing to mention, I recently found out my testosterone was ridiculously low at 194. So now I’m on medication for it and it’s risen back to just below 600 currently. Its had a massive effect on my thinking as well as my body. I’m no where near as keen on certain things I used to crave. Also if I’ve cum already the thought of clean up etc is a no go. Where as before it made no difference. Just thought it worth mentioning. As in UK the docs won’t treat you until you go below 300. Abroad where I got tested etc they treat you if you’re below 600! It’s also made a huge difference in my performance. Cock is much harder and easy to repeat. I’ve not been able to do round 2 without a break for years. Even with a break it was touch and go and where most of my problems maintaining errections came from.

        For anyone whos interested they put me on 500iu hcg (human chlorionic gonadatropin) every other day, 10mg tamoxifen 3 times a week, 10000iu vit D 3 times a week and B12 once a month.

        Dave x

      • #39563
        Mommy who is 45 and has cucked her son and many more

          Ease her into it sweetie first time I did a cuck session was for my son he was 18 at the time and I was divorced he enjoyed and so did I honestly just ask her or see if she is interested in having a swap session or just tell her you are into cuckolding. But also this thing is very common in men but it isn’t really open to speak in most Men. Good luck sweetie!

        • #39565
          Dave

            Thanks for the reply, we speak about it all the time. I think to the point I’m doing her head in with it all. As I said she came close a couple of times. I went away end of September for 2 weeks on business. While I was away she bumped into a guy on the street who she grew up with. He’s a gym bunny so big muscular frame etc. She said he was staring at her chest as she was talking. So she said, “I’m up here” with a chuckle. To which he apologised. She replied, “it’s fine, you can come and see them up close and personal if you like” with a smile. They swapped numbers and he was straight in with the filthy messages. However she isn’t really into that and he messed up by going on about how kinkiy he was. As he wanted her to suck his toes and lick/finger his arse. So she replied, “well I’m a little kinky myself so hows about this, I’ll tie you to my bed and make you eat me until I’ve cum, then I’ll ride you until you’re about to cum. Then I’m gonna get out my double ender and fuck you until you cum in my hand and I’m gonna wipe it all over your face!” lmao his reply was,”no thanks I’m not into any of that at all” then radio silence. I guess he wasn’t as kinky as he thought.

            Anyway she sent me a screen shot of his message which was keeping me up all night. I couldn’t leave myself alone. But the following morning, I awoke not in a horny mood at all. Within seconds I thought about the screen shot she sent me and realised that there was no battery indicator or signal symbol etc or his contact details. So I realised she had cropped a screen shot and sent it me. So then I sent her a screen shot of our conversation and the one she’d sent me with the line, “one of these is a screen shot, the other is a cropped picture” which didn’t go down well. She went off on me saying how she didn’t even wanna do any of this and was only doing it for me and nothing she did was ever right. Which isn’t true but it ruined the whole thing. As I don’t want her to do this for me. Without the knowledge that she is doing it for herself it’s no good and does nothing for me. I need her to feel liberated and free to do as she wishes. Not to feel like she’s pimping herself out to give me a thrill. I can’t imagine its true as she obviously fancied the guy in order to have the initial flirt. But I’m taking it very easy now. Trying my best to keep my mouth shut and not do her head in by constantly talking about it.

          • #39579
            Luvinsunshine

              That’s a wonderful thing about our lifestyle. We don’t all fit the same mold. You may be more like my husband and I. We are more of a Stag and Vixen Couple than a cuck couple. Good luck with your journey.

            • #39666
              Athlete952

                Hey Dave,

                I am coming at this from a bull’s perspective, so take it with a grain of salt, but here are some thoughts. The bottom-line upfront is that if you want your wife to sleep with other men, with your knowledge and support, you are a cuck (or at least the desire to be one). That is it. Whether you conform to some internet stereotype of what a cuckold is or isn’t doesn’t matter. Most of that stuff is nonsense anyway and the only things that matter is what works for you, your wife, and your marriage.

                Far too often the internet stereotype is that all cucks are underendowed, terrible lovers, submissive in/out of the bedroom (i.e., betas), and have sissy desires. While there may be some cucks out there who fit that stereotype, it certainly isn’t most or all. In my experience, most cucks would easily be described as typical husbands. Most are at least average size, have average sexual abilities, and are far from being outwardly submissive.

                I’ve had cucks who were above average in endowment. I had one who had been with couples himself. For most, our relationship has often been their first experience exploring their submissive feelings.

                What unites them all is the desire to have their wives pleased by another man. Additionally, the desire is usually for that man to be a well-above-average lover. In fact, they want the best for their wives. Size, stamina, body, confidence, and general ability to please.

                All of that is to say don’t overthink it. Find what works best for you, your wife, and your marriage. Also, realize that getting involved in the lifestyle is a learning process. Your wants and desires will evolve with time as you find what you like/don’t like. Take your time, over-communicate with your wife, and play safe.

                Happy to discuss further and answer any questions. Best of luck

              • #39700
                Dave

                  Thanks for the replies guys. I think you might have nailed it there luvinsunshine. But like you said athlete952, I guess its only really about the one thing (her getting max pleasure from sex that I can’t provide) and any other details are secondary in importance. I don’t think that she will be venturing into the scene any time soon. As we’ve had a long honest chat and she’s made it clear that when she’s come close, it was only ever about making me happy as I “never shut up about it”. So for me knowing that she herself doesn’t actually have any need or desire for it makes it totally unappealing. I thought once the reality that it really is a turn on for me and not some trick to catch her out etc. She would be all for it. But as it turns out I’m imposing my own views on others again. As she genuinely doesn’t need or want anyone else in our sex life.

                  Her health has deteriorated in the last few years since she had Lyme. She litteraly aged about 20 years in 4. We met when I was 30 and she 38. Back then someone actually once thought I was her dad she looked so young! Unfortunately its taken it’s toll on her labido too. She was insatiable when we met. But now she is more than content with twice a month. I’ve ordered a pussy pump in a last ditch attempt to try to revive her labido, as she thinks increasing the blood flow will maybe help. She’s also going to have surgery to remove the inside of her breasts due to genetic cancer risk. So she’s joked about having them upgraded while shes at it. So maybe she just doesn’t feel confident enough right now. She was very well known previously all her life for her shape. People would say she had “the best arse in sheffield” lol. She also always had a very prominent and bulging vulva which always caught mens attention. So for her to go from looking a very sexy early 20’s at 38 to her age or older at 46 in such a short span of time I think has affected her quite a bit. So I’m not holding my breath with it.

                  Rest assured if anything changes I’ll be sure to report back.

                  • #39710
                    Athlete952

                      Dave,

                      You’re making the right call. While I know that it is hard to forgo your fantasies, this has to be about your wife’s wants and desires. If she feels forced into it, she won’t enjoy it; if she doesn’t enjoy it, you won’t enjoy it. That will not only ruin the fantasy for you but also likely harm the marriage. It is just not worth it.

                      When I meet couples, if I get the sense that the wife is being forced into the lifestyle, it is an immediate red flag. Those husbands are putting their own desires ahead of their wives and that is a major concern.

                      Finally, sorry to hear about her medical issues. Hopefully, she will be able to recover and get back to full health. You never know, a recovery may increase her self-confidence and get her interested in exploring those desires. Fingers crossed for you both.

                      Eric

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