Home discussion Lifestyle Discussions Member Success Stories Establishing Fixed Boundaries…

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    • #32149
      Barbara

      We are not particularly experienced like most of the couples on here but I’m sure someone has run into the same issue.

      We have limited ourselves to just my husband’s best and most trusted friend. We found the more casual hook-ups bring with them a lot of nervousness and self consciousness. I have been fairly liberal with playtime and when the guys want it, but I’ve run into a problem. We’ve been with “Scott” enough that he can spend the night at our place. I sleep in-between the guys. My husband has been OK and said it has been hot to be awakened by the bed moving back and forth. There have been many times Scott and I have just quietly given mutual oral or had sex in the Missionary position so it was quieter and it we both move more slowly with less noise from bodies and ball sack slaps against my butt. My husband is OK with sneaking in a quiet one and then laughing in the morning.

      My husband recently had to travel for 5 days and I HATE being alone at night! I asked (to test the waters) if Scott could could stay here a few nights. My husband was OK with that but I told him I was not going to mess around with Scott until he got home. We all talked about it and my husband told Scott I was not going to be doing anything sexual until he returned. Scott was cool with that and said he’d stay just to make me feel more secure. On the first night I saw no real concern about kissing so that’s all we did the first night. The second night Scott initiated more kisses which I was fine with and I could easily tell he was hard. I reached down and felt it saying, “I wish [He] was home. I’d definitely take care of that for you.” Scott was fine because he had agreed to my husband’s request. After we had kissed for maybe 10 minutes I said goodnight and just rolled into the blankets with him knowing I was going to fall asleep pretty quickly. Scott asked if I had any problem with him masturbating or watching him do it. I agreed figuring I was going to slip off to sleep anyway, but when I saw Scott’s silhouette with his body and boner as he began stroking it I was suddenly awake and really got into watching him. When he shot three long “ropes” I was thinking it was really hot but “what a waste of a good cum shot” and I told him so. We just laughed. him so. He did the same thing the next two nights. I did it with him but touched only myself.

      On the last night Scott and I went skinny-dipping in our Jacuzzi, we took a shower together where he shampooed my hair, he shaved and trimmed up my legs and landing strip and I carefully shaved his butt (what guys do that anyway?) and everywhere he had a tan line that didn’t see the sun. I carefully shaved his nut sack. As I shaved the shaft of his cock he was hard in seconds which made it easier to shave him and avoid nicks. I soaped him up head to toe (yeah, butt crack too) but as he rinsed off he started masturbating again. It was so difficult to sit on the tiled shower seat and not grab it or put my mouth around it! I started doing it for myself but about 5 minutes into it Scott said he was going to cum. I was not going to touch him even though I wanted to so I closed my eyes and and was trying to be sexy-funny so I let my mouth hang open. I told him, “No head! Just pretend. You’ll get it when [my husband] gets back tomorrow.” About 30 seconds later Scott was making his “I’m gonna cum” sounds and without touching me he shot a couple big ol’ ropes right into my mouth. I opened my eyes and Scott was smiling with a
      silly-funny face like a kid that got away with something. I just rolled my eyes, smiled and swallowed. We finished rinsing off and got out to dry off. I just felt like something was different but just let it go. He apologized, we got into bed and kissed for about 10 minutes. He spooned up behind me with his usual boner. I wrapped my hand around it and just said goodnight. I know he was bummed.

      So here’s the question: My husband knew Scott spent the night; we slept in the same bed; Scott and I have previously had really good sex with my husband’s OK. I never made any overt sexual offers and was just playing when I opened my mouth like I did in the shower. My husband knew we showered together. When Scott shot his cum shot into my mouth, by swallowing it instead of spitting it out, did I break the rules? Should I have been angry with Scott? Should I sit down and explain all the gory details to my husband? Since that night Scott and I have had great sex and I’ve (like usual) sucked Scott’s cock and swallowed his load 4 times. Time to get over the guilt question and let it go? I’m always open to good input so I will never reply with a condescending insult! Thank you for taking time from your busy day to read this. I hope it was worth it and stimulated thought. I’d appreciate hearing it…
      Sincerely,
      BarbaraJO
      O.C. CA

    • #32152
      Katie&sean

      Barbara,
      First of all, being a female, I can relate to precisely what you have gone through and what you are currently going through. Embrace it all! These are the very best times of your life and marriage! To answer your earnest questions, no, you did not break the rules because you saved intercourse for when your husband returned. Yes, you could be angry with Scott because he was greedy and definitely pushed the boundaries of your previously established rules. That deserves definite correction with a detailed discussion first with your husband alone then together with Scott. Scott needs some type of punishment such as no staying over for 2 weekends while you instead invite a different lover. That alone will make Scott really contemplate, self-assess, and offer sincere contrition for what he did. When a boyfriend knows someone else is temporarily (and possibly permanently) taking his place, he can very well be corrected according to YOUR terms and NOT his terms. You will be pleasantly amazed and deeply touched at how you can develop and nurture a very unique form of love with boyfriends together with your husband. I’d like to continue this commentary and have it be a discussion with you. I forwarded my contact address in a previous e-mail. Hope to talk with you soon!
      Hugs!
      Katie~

      • #33753
        Barbara

        Katie,
        Please send me that Email address again. I have only one female friend I could ever talk about sex with. You said you wanted to talk and ask me a few questions. I’d really like that.
        Thanks,
        Barbara
        Email: Never post personal information in public forums.

    • #33295
      johnnie

      That’s exactly the reason my wife stopped seeing who was once my best friend. We invited him into our bed well before we got married. To my own surprise the first time I watched I found it so damned arousing that I knew I’d want to see it again. It became almost a regular thing a couple times a month for three plus years. Then one night a couple weeks ago he invited her over to his house during the lockdown. This was outside the norm and outside of what she, he, and I had agreed to so many years ago. I was crest fallen when she left to spend two nights alone. But fate intervened. She was trying to tell him how concerned I was about breaking the rules when he interrupted her. “Fuck him. Fuck that faggot”, was what he got out. My wife was genuinely pissed and told him, “No. Fuck you.” and she came home. We both know that we’ll miss the third party and will more than likely invite another guy to join us. Like Brooke Benton sang, “It’s just a matter of time.

    • #33299
      Luvr

      Establishing fixed boundaries in such relationships is a mine field that often blows up this experience. For me, setting them as an inexperienced couple is like drawing a map of a continent you just set foot on.

      The alternative is what I call The Golden Rule – it’s a simple rule, but complicated to execute on because it does require a lot of communication (which is already a core component of doing this successfully).

    • #33751
      Don

      Just my opinion, but with such limited boundaries, it sounds like it is set up to fail. Or, as Luvr put it, strict boundaries seems like creating a mine field. It’s almost like telling my wife and her lover “just the tip.”

      My wife has three boundaries. They are very simple and common sense. 1. Try not to get pregnant. 2. Keep is safe. 3. Don’t fall in love with your lover so much that she wants to leave me for him.

      Other than that, my wife is welcome to have as much sex with her lover, whenever she wants and as much as she wants. If she wants to spend a weekend with her lover, at his place, fine. If he wants to come over to our place, that’s fine as well.

      As an airline pilot, I am gone 3 to 4 days a week. Although I love it when the three of us share one bed, I also like it when her lover stays at our house while I’m gone. Not just because he is taking care of her sexual needs, but having him in the house with her, provides a degree of safety for her as opposed to being home alone. None of these rules change if I’m home or not.

      • #33754
        Barbara

        Hi Don!
        Thank you for writing to me regarding my posting on having certain limits. I was not writing to make it sound like a complaint or anything. I just shared what happened and asked if it was outside my agreement with my husband (K). After reading many postings on here and other websites I also read them with K and asked his opinion. I never had any issues with respecting any limits because it made my husband feel good and I felt good not having any feelings of guilt or concealing something that could wreck K’s best friend and partner bond with Scott and he was always OK (even though I knew he’d do it if he could). The positive thing is after reading everything I could find on cuckolding. but K really liked stuff on “wife sharing.” Scott has been a single dad for a looooong time so I addressed that while watching movies about it with K. After a few hours we were in our Jacuzzi when K said if I REALLY wanted to ‘help out” Scott, a week ago Monday-Thursday, He wanted to see a video or Skype it but only he would know that time. Who was I to let that get away?!

        That Monday night Scott came over after K had flown out. Before I got there I thought a video would be clearer and I know the sound is more sensitive. I put the camera on an antique stereo and hid it behind an ugly fake flower arrangement. When Scott texted me he was on his way I turned on the camera and recorded things on a computer so I could send it to K. I was conflicted but I didn’t want Scott feeling like he had to act a certain or whisper. When he got there he was more excited than usual. We kissed for more than 10 minutes and he almost gave me a hickey! He figured the pillows and comforters on the living room floor was the give away. We undressed each other and I got right to a kneeling blow job. I looked up at him and told him I was his and we were free for whatever he wanted. I didn’t think he could get any harder but that did it. After the obligatory blow job and swallow and him spending a LOT of time with his mouth all over me, he finally asks, “So K is OK with me fucking you now?” I said, “Any position you want.” Aside from how I felt after the two oral orgasms, when I said that I felt total relaxation come over me and I hate to admit it, but I did not think of my husband once until Scott was leaving.

        I turned around and leaned on the back of a chair so the camera would get all of him going into me. I was waiting for him to just push it in and pump, but he pushed the head of his cock into me until it “popped” past my pubic bone. He just stood there rubbing and scratching my back that drove me nuts. I pushed and pulled my pussy over his cock until I felt him against my butt. Then he went to work and I learned how dirty that boy can really talk! He pulled me upright and pumped upward and then hit the good spot! I felt self-conscious letting out a grunt but it felt so good. He fucked me like that for close to 15 minutes and I did not realize he had bitten my back and shoulder twice leaving teeth marks until after he had worn me out and we got in the shower. Total truth, my husband can go for 60-90 minutes and I’m beat but scott got in me three times and I pulled off his condom after fucking me standing up. I hate those things! Three great orgasms for him and three surprisingly sloppy creampies for me that I made sure could be seen by the camera. We fucked like a newlywed couple tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday afternoon. K got home late Thursday and didn’t ask to see anything until we were getting into bed and he saw the bites on my back and shoulder, butt and even my hip that I didn’t even feel for some reason. He saw them and I told him they were from Scott. THEN he finally asked me something about Scott and me over 4 days. I didn’t get the fuck in the Jacuzzi or the one at 2:30am Wednesday on the grass in our front yard (yes, alcohol made me overly daring), but I told him about them. I thought he was just bugged on the phone but he said he didn’t have time to think about it.

        I got the movie drive and just thought, “Here goes. I hope he doesn’t get upset.” I started it and said I had to go to the kitchen. I waited almost 10 minutes and walked back. I recognized my gross cum noises and Scott’s voice. K was on top of the covers as hard as a rock. I just had to suck it! He watched 3 sessions back to back and shocked me when he came so hard in my mouth I almost lost some of it. Then he stayed hard! I got mine from him and when we were done I asked him what he thought. He liked it and said it was almost like watching Scott and me firsthand. Tomorrow night it Monday and Scott is coming over. K. will be gone until Wednesday. He’s not ready to try eating me after I take Scott’s load and he said he’s definitely not taking Scott in his mouth. I guess at this point then it is more of “hotwifing.” Not a bad place to be and between K and Scott I can decide when and who I want. I’ll see.
        Sincerely,
        Barbara

    • #33756
      Don

      Hey Barbara, sorry if my post was misleading. As far as your OP, I don’t think you were outside of your agreement at all. But, that’s just my opinion.

      K sounds a lot like me. Although we are more of a hotwife couple, I like referring to myself as a cuckold. Like K, though, I haven’t gone down on my wife to eat her lover’s load, nor have I taken her lover into my mouth.

      My hat is off to K, though. I cannot last 60-90 minutes. Maybe when I was younger, but I’m lucky to last 15 minutes now, lol. However, my inadequacies do serve to fuel my cuckold desires. I like my wife having a lover that can outdo me, sexually, in every way. If my wife (S) would have done a video like you did, I would have loved it.

      I hope everything continues to go well with you, Scott and K. S and I, both, seek a long term lover for her where the three of us can become a triad. We have tried, but I’m not sure if we will ever find that guy. Her longest lover has only lasted about 6 months.

      • #35190
        Barbara

        Hi Don,
        This reply has been a long time coming but with Covid crap we were like most people and totally quarantined, but starting August 1, 2020, I told my husband I really “needed” a good 3-way with him and Scott. He said whatever I wanted just maybe video the play. He’s got seniority so he’s flying a lot more and having to move planes back and forth so the airline doesn’t lose the gate and route.

        The first night Scott came over it was funny when they were passing each other. They talked a few minutes and my hubby drove off. Scott picked me up while we were kissing in the driveway and spun me around. I knew there was some confusion from a couple neighbors who saw it. Scott carried me inside, locked the door and we were on it! I raced to undress him but when he undressed me it was slow, sensual and a lot of kissing and touching. I told him I and our house were totally his until K returned 4 1/2 days later. Scott and I just kissed and caressed and we had an actual conversation for most of an hour. I felt like it was complete infatuation like the first time Scott got a blow job. The whole evening was passionate and I stopped counting my orgasms, but I knew he had three by the time we curled up in bed. The next morning he showered and went to work. You’d be surprised how quickly stuff fell into a routine. I had dinner ready every evening – except we ate totally naked and just watched some TV until one of us couldn’t take the tension anymore until he or I made a move without even talking. By the third night I was feeling muscle soreness, especially the way Scott likes my legs spread as far as I can (I stretch every day now!) My poor girl parts had taken a beating!

        On the last night (4th) he actually took me out like a real date! We played with each other under the table and I know my face had to be a giveaway to the winking women who knew what we were doing. He was getting out some kind of crazy pent up energy. In the parking structure he pulled down my undies and I let them fall on the cement. I was shocked when he put me up on the trunk of his car and I just laid back while he went down on me. Cars drove by and people were walking to their cars (one right next to us) not even acknowledging surprise, but camera phones were out! The wife of that couple next to us said she keeps wishing for the same thing! Times have changed and at least Scott could hide his face under my skirt. He finished me off and we drove home. Fortunately it was dark. He put me on the nice warm hood of his car and we fucked right there in our driveway for a good 15 minutes! His cum ran out when he pulled me up so I figured he’d use the mess as a memory. We got into the tub and just talked but it was erotic when he shampooed my hair for me. When we got out we hit the bed and I was wishing I’d recorded this night of all! We laid in bed watching porn and whenever either of us wanted something it was done. I didn’t want to break the rhythm so I just used a towel instead of going to the potty right away. We did it twice and he pulled me out to the Jacuzzi two hours later. He didn’t even turn it on. I figured he must have taken a Viagra or something because that beautiful thing kept popping right up! The next morning we were awakened by K coming home 7 hours early. He shouted, “I saw the car in my driveway so you two finish up.” That made Scott horny to hear he was home so “boing” there it was again. In ten minutes we were doing it again and 15 minutes later Scott called K to come up. Just as my husband walked into the room and I made eye contact with him with him – Scott on top and in me, Scott was breathing hard and he let himself go ejaculating enough into me the spatter thing happened as he pumped until he was just done. My husband leaned over to kiss me but Scott pushed his face back and kissed me first. No problems at all by the time Scott finally fell out of me and he rolled onto his back.

        Don, my husband couldn’t do it in front of his best friend so we talked until Scott ran to the bathroom. First time my husband went down on me. I was surprised. He wiped off the splatter on my thighs and landing strip with his hand but he licked and actually sucked on me and to hear him making swallowing sounds was pretty hot. He kept going until the toilet flushed and he got up to change out of his uniform. I made all of us breakfast while they talked and the only thing my husband said about things was he hoped it was good and he got everything out of his system…literally. Scott left soon after breakfast and my hubby and I made out like teenagers and I felt great giving him his 4 1/2 day release and taking it all. We actually fell asleep afterward! What really made everything so awesome was there was no boundary bullcrap to distract me. It’s a new time for the three of us and I’m eagerly waiting for this flu stuff to go away. We talked and now it’s anytime I want it, but if he’s home I just need to make sure what he’s feeling too; voyeur or participant. Don, my apology if you felt I was rude and forgetting manners. Been A LOT of stuff going on.
        Sincerely,
        Barbara (Sorry it was so long but I got turned on typing away!)

    • #39033
      mrdnrm

      When we first started out back in 2003 it seemed like we have a millions rules or Boundaries to stay within. It’s been 19 years now and all those rules and boundaries we found have been broken or removed sometimes causing stress to our relationship that was not necessary. What we have learned is to set expectations for the evening or relationship and allow only my wife to change what is going to happen. Next to have a verbal escape word(s) for safety and to call it a night. We also have a physical gesture code for me to get her lover or bull to stop. I may be 60 years old and have trouble with my cock and performance in bed, but I am still a Marine and a tough old bastard that can still fight. So her pleasure and safety is my priority. There are only two of the original rules we set on day one that still exist and fully respected today for us. Rule 1. No one fucks her in our bed, fuck her anywhere you want to just not in our bed. Rule 2. No one fucks her without me being present, that’s for her safety and my absolute pleasure to watch her.

      We have had many guys who wanted to meet her off to the side or when I was not around, she has always quickly told me about it and she has always shut that down immediately. Every day I tell my wife how beautiful she is, how sexy she is, how turned on I am by her. and how much it turns me on to watch her get completely pleasured by another man and how addicted I am to seeing that. That’s how much I love being her Cuckold Husband!


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