Cuckolding is the solution to western civilization’s decline.
It’s a pretty bold headline, I realize, but bear with me. I see the practice of sharing wives and creating happiness from the inclusion of an additional male in the marriage as the solution to the crisis which is surely building and I want you to share my vision.
In a previous post Submission: A Woman’s Choice, I briefly touched on the topic of how contemporary feminism (third wave) is an outright attack on masculinity, undermines relationships and has a role in destabilizing society. I wrote that in 2013 and since then, the attack on males by the radical feminist movement has reached a tipping point. Colleges are now teaching courses on the “toxicity of masculinity” and hostility toward men simply for being male (how we sit, expressing nearly any form of flirtation) is at an all-time high and yet people are shocked to find a published survey reports men would prefer a sexbot (sex robot) over a woman. Obvious link, anyone?
First wave feminists (1950s) were about elevating women and acquiring the same opportunity as men (but not expecting or necessarily wanting the same outcome). By the 70s, feminism was losing the elevation perspective and starting the offensive. By the 90s, feminism had essentially abandoned elevating women and only sought to minimize men while demanding equal outcomes between men and women. That of course is never going to be the case because fortunately, men and women are practically different species and I couldn’t be happier about that.
I stumbled across a video on YouTube that criticized third-wave feminism and tied together how feminism has undermined social order. I realized how affected I was already by the constant drumbeat against “patriarchy” because I was shocked by anyone openly supporting patriarchy. I realized I had fallen into the trap of allowing one side to define something and had forgotten that context and perspective matter.
Black Pigeon Speaks paints a compelling case against this form of feminism and its effects on millennial males in particular, but does attack female sexuality in the way evangelical or socially conservative groups tend to do. These points with which I cannot agree nonetheless helped lead me to my full conclusion.
You may want to click past the in-line advertising at the beginning – annoying, but I’m not going to fault him for wanting to make a living.
Watching this left me agreeing that patriarchy may be necessary for western civilization to survive, but along with patriarchy comes evangelical bullshit about the continued necessity to inhibit and repress female sexuality. Or does it…?
More recently I took stock of some of the qualities I was seeing in males who were seeking to be a cuckold. I saw a sharp increase in what I would call sissy attributes. By sissy, I mean the traditional sense of not exhibiting stereotypical masculine traits or being effeminate and the exact opposite of masculinity. The next realization I made recently was that unlike in years past, the majority of these males weren’t even in committed relationships let alone married. In fact, it seemed they likely hadn’t even had a serious relationship with a female and some of these men are in their late 20s or even early 30s.
What do they have in common? About twenty years of radical feminism.
Millennial males are largely giving up on trying to be men and without trying to be men, women can’t compete for them and truly be women. This trend started when the term “metro-sexual” was coined to describe the less masculine identities of males inhabiting larger cities. Fast-forward to today and we can see that this movement was just the tip of the iceberg. Due to the Internet, social media, and the pervasive nature of culture, one needn’t be in a population center to be inundated beneath a wave of male-bashing.
Enter, Camille Paglia, an unadulterated feminist of the original sort who sought identity and opportunity for women without attacking men to do so – a first wave feminist. Camille is a well known speaker on gender topics and her speech below is a compelling argument for how contemporary or third wave feminism is leading to the collapse of our society as has happened before. Yes, you read that right – as has happened before.
She strips away a lot of the bullshit, doesn’t she? I find her speech compelling because she makes observations about our behavior that are inherently linked to our biology – the same biology that motivates women to enjoy being admired and desired despite being told by society that its shameful. The same biology that forces males to rank themselves socially and determine who should get the opportunity to mate.
Next up is another gem by Black Pigeon Speaks. In this one he echoes my own beliefs that women truly want to be noticed and desired – it’s a biological imperative. He is also highly critical of the tendency of third wave feminists to deny sexual objectification is a goal or even ever desired – which is clearly not the case among non-radicalized women (otherwise known as attractive women if you’ve seen much of the radical ones). He does throw around the slut label with some abandon and I understand he is a conservative with the view that women’s sexuality is dirty, but he makes a good point of highlighting the idiocy of emphasizing a woman’s sexual appeal and claiming it’s not about sex appeal.
I reject the idea that it’s only men who objectify women. Women objectify men by looking at them as a wallet – as a job – how well can we support ourselves and them. I’m not criticizing them for it – again, it’s a biological function as is our appreciation and sexual interest in women. This again supports the idea that patriarchy is the best fit.
Traditional patriarchal societies feel forced to prevent women from exhibiting or exploring their sexuality.
A Brief History of Patriarchy and Female Sexual Repression
Patriarchy isn’t just an academic term for a social system, it’s become a trigger, a weapon, a slur, and a cause for “feminism”. Despite the truth behind patriarchy having built civilization as we know it, there is a lot to not like about it. Patriarchy and monogamous marriage are essentially synonyms and silent partners with Christianity, Judaism, and Islam – all of which heavily penalize women’s sexuality. It’s not that they hate women, it’s more about the outcomes of female sexuality in an age before birth control.
When tribal societies were settling into town and cities humanity (men) became land owners and the ability to pass down an inheritance to a legitimate heir became very valuable. Without birth control, heavy social and personal expectations were attached to the fidelity of women. These expectations built into the core beliefs of all major religions to be point of being indistinguishable from theology. A woman’s sexuality became the plague the entire family and greater society had to contain. Islam responded by covering women head to toe in a burka. Christianity and Judaism have their own edicts regarding covering of women, though less to an extent than of Islam.
Under such patriarchy, men no longer truly compete with each other to the degree our biology would expect. Men need only convince a woman – or be given one through arrangement, to never have to compete with another male sexually. Women have little opportunity to explore their sexuality without being shamed as sluts while single and as married women, are expected to be monogamous and ignore the biological imperative of sexual selection.
Patriarchy can also be kind, loving, caring and supportive, but that aspect is purposefully overlooked by those with an agenda. Positive patriarchy is expressed in day to day relationships where the male is simply perceived as the natural leader of the family even where the couple operate roughly as peers. This dynamic is enhanced considerably when the couple openly practice any type of D/s lifestyle where they proactively explore the nature of his dominant and her submissive role. This practice, and the idea that a patriarchal relationship can be enjoyable flourished a bit after the Fifty Shades books despite the books being poorly written and from a perspective which clearly lacked any foundation in the true motivations for people in D/s relationships.
Sexual Choice As A Biological Imperative
Stereotypical belief holds that the majority of women prefer dominant men with a masculine body type. But there is good news for men who do not fit this description. New research suggests that most women are only attracted to this type of man for a few days a month – during ovulation – and do not desire them as long-term partners. -UCLA study via Medical News Today
This is demonstration of both the pair-bonding effect and sexual selection – and evidence as to why cuckolding is so successful for couples. As with other mammals, humans want a pair-bond, but females will compete against other females for the most sexually appealing males. Studies have shown repeatedly that women will turn a blind eye to sharing the same male if he is the obvious mating choice. This is why women typically have an 80% chance to reproduce while males only have about a 40% chance to reproduce.
Cuckolding As A Solution
We aren’t just driven by our biology – we have conscious thought as well which is why women will desire a more sexually desirable male even when not ovulating. The act of mating, in a primal sense, is very much an act of submission on the female’s part – she is taken. This dynamic plays out in women who have rape fantasies not understanding this is a desire to express submission, not be the victim of a violent assault. This mechanism also applies in cuckold marriages where the role of bull is automatically one of authority or of being the alpha simply by virtue of having been invited into a marriage for a sexual role. Women in a cuckold marriage are far more likely to enjoy being assertive with their cuckold and submissive, if only passively, for their boyfriend. In more cases, that submissive expression increases over time for both husband and wife.
Cuckolding has the opportunity to achieve the goals and desires of patriarchy because:
- a boyfriend patriarch still ensures a family model
- a boyfriend patriarch still enables a path to procreation whether with the boyfriend or the husband
Cuckolding has the opportunity to achieve the goals and desires of (first-wave) feminism by:
- empowering women to have the same level of sexual opportunity as men
- empowering a woman’s sexual choices to be her own
- enabling hotwives to be a woman first and a wife second
Cuckolding supports and enables a natural lifestyle apart from theology and the artificial and fickle norms of society by:
- allowing a couple to define their relationship as they choose to experience it
- supporting a male having a role other than the one expected by society
Cuckolding empowers each of us to be who we really are at the biological level and who we prefer to be on the social level.
- the boyfriend is in a natural leadership role, even if not actively acted upon, but when acted upon, enables a male to feel and enjoy being fully masculine with a woman who will appreciate and respond in kind – he is the patriarch
- the cuckold is free from a sense of duty to be the type of male that society falsely expects him to be and can be the life partner his wife needs – in situations where the husband is masculine himself, that fact simply reinforces the gift he’s giving his wife and her boyfriend
- the wife is able to explore her sexuality much more openly than in a traditional patriarchy and while having a boyfriend is less of an expression of female sexual choice than biology would call for, it’s also a far safer exploration of sexual choice
Cuckolding, between a couple and another male, is always a balancing act, a compromise – a dynamic exchange of permission and authority that should balance itself between adventure, safety, and intimacy. This balancing helps moderate the more negative impacts of traditional patriarchy.
- the patriarchal nature of a boyfriend’s role is counter-balanced by his investment in the relationship
- to maintain that balance he has to be aware of and see to the wife’s needs beyond sexual and part of that will be her cuckold’s needs
- the cuckold has is own needs, but one of them is to see to her needs and fulfillment, this reinforces the wife’s enjoyment as well as the boyfriend’s
Couples successful in cuckolding rarely choose to go back to how things were before. Boyfriends may change over time, but the fundamental enjoyment and benefits for a couple – and for western civilization carry on.
And this, in a nutshell, is how cuckolding can push back the radical, destructive feminists, enable women to be both loved and sexually fulfilled – all while saving western civilization!
Our life isn’t natural anymore.
We shouldn’t have any restrictions in our natural biological life. In particular women have been restricted in their sexual desire for many hundreds of years, especially for inheritance law reasons.
The governments and the Catholic Church have explained to them what makes a good and a bad woman.
It’s important that we return to naturalness.
Our sexuality isn’t just a part of our life, it is the most important biological part that determines so much in our life.
It’s our largest reservoir of joy, happiness and satisfaction.
Sometimes it’s difficult for for men to satisfy the own wife for various reasons.
Why should a woman divorced just to enjoy sexual pleasure again?
So to get a man into a marriage is a very natural possibility for everyone to bring fun and joy back into a marriage.
The husband gets less pressure to have to do everything and everything depends on him and the wife no longer has to suppress her lust but instead can awaken her forgotten natural desire for men and enjoy it to the fullest.
Here she does not have to make a decision but can, according to her biological instinct, regularly mate with the man she likes and make love with a man her body is longing for and she has wild desire.
Without always having to pay attention to his inner values.
She has the freedom to choose a man according to her biology who is completely potent and fertile and for her horny to fuck and who makes her pregnant with a beautiful child because he has the best sperm and can inseminate her very deep.
As nature intended it.
This for me is the most intmate and beautiful part in a nice cuckold marriage because I, as her husband, will always love to accept her child as mine, love it and raise it with her no matter which lover made it to her because she is my loving wife and she will always be.
Yes, the husband’s love frees his wife’s sexual desires and makes him a good father, not the sperm.
Another highly articulate article, Luvr. You always provide us with very well written and poignant information. Thank you for the time you spend on this site and the articles/ideas you share with us.
For a long time I suffered from the pressure to act as a strong man. I could not satisfy my wife sexually (no orgasm) and I felt guilty about it. After several years of discussions, I told her that I would not mind if she would only do it for sex with another man. At first she was shocked because she had a conservative Catholic education, but after a few days she said it would not be cheating if I allowed it. Now she sometimes does it with a colleague, I feel more relaxed. Is this the modern marriage you mean?
You did it great. You don’t need to feel bad that you can’t fully satisfy your wife. I feel the same pressure like you because my erection often isn’t enough for a satisfying intercourse.
You gave her more than she could wish for in such a situation. The permission so she can find her joy outside your marriage.
Your wife will be very grateful to you for this strong love you have for her.
This is the right way of a modern marriage.
Thank you, Chrisy! Yes, the lack of erection is a big problem and causes a lot of frustration. You can compensate a bit with your hand and your mouth, but my wife wanted more. Before you introduce the cuckolding, you have to communicate a long time about related matters, such as previous experiences and sexual fantasies. Express your love and tell her that you want her to have all the fun she wants. Promise her that you won’t do it with another woman. I would like to hear from you how this works.
good comment Linda . all adults and society and religion has ‘rules’ in place that seem to seek to control and keep things in check. possibly for best motives but in many ares of world with. falling female births and more males than females , is it not time to bite bullet and consider it may be better for world of we all. relaxed our attitudes a bit and not put down others have found for them at least, a far better way to live.
some cultures. already allow for more than one wife ..why not more than one man?
females can easily handle this physically in most cases. males tend to be sexually at peak at early ages too and then many these days suffer stress etc and ED. relationships get strained . far better to ‘allow’ partner to find outlet and supplier for our basic human needs than suffer and have a poor relationship for life.
cuckolding works for some but not all. way we were wired by nature. culture social pressures etc all play a part as does opportunity when growing up to explore our sexuality and grow as well as make errors .
This makes me more comfortable taking the plunge. Sounds right for us.
Great stuff. You had me at Black Pigeon Speaks and Camille Paglia, but a very logical and honest look at where we are as a culture. I was at a presentation at my duaghter’s school yesterday (Catholic, all-girls), and it was ridiculous how much third-wave feminism has corrupted the thinking of two generations (teachers and students).
The wives I work with seem so peaceful and happy, but most married women I see around me all seem so angry– at the country, at their husband, at themselves. I’m glad that I can help a few marriages at a time, but we need a step-change. And culture is the best way to do it.
I believe that Modern Family changed the positioning of the gay community more than Stonewall or any political campaigns. Once you see a new culture as familiar and relatable, you can change your mind about it. A popular TV series that showed hotwifing in a positive light could do more for American happiness than anything else I can think of.
Thanks, Luvr, for being one of the first people fighting this cultural battle– between you, Alexis McCall, and New Sensations we might make American marriages great again.
Excellent post as always, Luvr! We all try and find what works best for us, and at least for my family cuckolding is the solution. Cuckolding is empowering and fulfilling, allows us to explore our inner fantasies and find out our balance. But I also understand that it may not be for everyone, because we are all different, we are at different stages of our lives and relationships. Similarly, we may not enjoy cuckolding forever and it may just be for some time. Who knows?